Since nobody wants to write about this stuff I guess I’ll do the dirty work.
Jenna Jameson gave birth to twin boys this week and the father is MMA fighter Tito Ortiz. Boy oh boy….where do I start with this one? First of all where is my girl StyleGal when I need her….I didn’t even know they were dating. Of course Jenna is the most recognizable figure in porn since Dirk Diggler so I’m not sure you would broadcast the fact you are trying to have a Porn Baby! But I need to know these things. I have tons of questions about this: Was this the quickest delivery ever? I just can’t picture all that much pushing going on in the delivery room….I’m just saying. If only I had known about this I would've checked to see if an Over/Under had been posted in Vegas for how long the birth would last. Anybody have a guess…..no more than 30 minutes between the time her water broke and the first baby was born? Maybe 30 minutes is too high. I'm positive we all could've made money on this.
Tito Ortiz? Seriously Jenna you could’ve had any guy you wanted and you picked Ortiz. I would say I’ve lost some respect for you but lets be honest….you are the Queen of Porn I already had no respect for you. If you are Ortiz how long did it take for you to ask for blood tests to confirm it’s yours? 5 seconds? 10 seconds? 2 minutes at the very most. And how about these twin boys. Being a twin can be tough enough…but then throw in the fact you’re mother is the number one reason the porn industry makes approximately $13 billion dollars a year. These kids will be ridiculed, teased, and tortured daily throughout elementary, junior, and high school until they are forced into the porn industry themselves. Now that would be some irony!