Monday, October 5, 2015

Heres to Hoping

Here is to hoping that Fall lasts longer than Spring.

This is what I learned this weekend:
1. Watching a 4 year old over night is exhausting. Always on the go and they never shut up.
2. At what point do you just let your hair grow and not get a cut.
3. If you aren't getting your pasta with cabonara sauce then you aint living.
4. Burning your hand on a pan fresh out the oven is not fun.
5. I heard the Kubie Krawl was a success. Great job by all those involved.
6. CVG is killing the Uber game, nothing confirmed that he also does LYFT on his other cell phone.
7. Chrissy has adjusted nicely to the over night but his wing addiction is through the roof.
8. Honestly who gets married on a Sunday?
9. I always seem to forget about going to Lamberts for fresh meats and veggies.
10. Bye bye Beachcomber.
11. Mario went to the movies for the 1st time in over 4 years and he will not be going back anytime soon.
12. I know I have said this before but this is the worst fantasy season I can remember.
13. Got my first win of Draft Kings this week and it feels great.
14. The Bruins season kicks off Thursday. Are you guys ready for this?

Thats all the time I have right now.

Have a nice week.

Thursday, October 1, 2015

Week 3 review

Week three is in the books and once again we had big name players coming down with injuries. 

Many in the league are starting to think there is a voodoo hammy dancing jinx running around ADSL. 

TMX insider Wes Cash is currently doing investigative research!! Hope to find out if voodoo  hammy dancing jinxes are a thing or not.  

Lets get to the week 3 review. This weeks winner was Black Dynomite with a season high 174. Black Dynomite got first round pick Bell back but his 23pts weren't the story it was Monday night magic as Rodgers and Cobb went off for 49 and 31 on Monday night!!! " Black Dynamite is stacked from front to back and ready to cruise like a Cadillac" per team management. Okie dokie.  

Second place this week was Jaybirds with 164. Julio and his 20 targets for 39 points and Brown again led the way. Brown may be in a bit of trouble losing Big Ben but Marshall is a wr1 and Fitzy put up 34 so there is no need to worry at wr spot in Jaybirds land. Muddy Rivers putting up 10pts may have to be addressed!!

Third place this week was DMC. Despite losing Big Ben DMC put up 153. AP, Olsen, J.Jones, and Bills d made up for Big Ben and Rookie Gurly putting up a combined 6pts!! Picking up Dalton should save DMC and keep him at the top. 

Fourth place this week was Creepshots with 138pts Mr first half Randle and Target monsters 36pts led the way in a week were Mega and Gronk had off weeks. Creepshots may have to look and see if he can move Stafford or at least try and start Tannehill to see if he's the answer. 

Fifth place this week was Charlie's Angels with 135. Huge week from Cards d and Brady paced the Angels. The running back stable led the team down with Jones and CJ putting up 4pts combined. A quick look at the bench sees the 91st overall pick outscored the 90th this week. QB controversy?? 

Sixth place with 134 was Beach Bums. Beach Bums had a huge 49 burger from AJ and  28 from Charles and newly acquired Eli put up 23 all were needed as the Bums got ZEROS from Andre Johnson AND Dolphins d! 

Seventh this week were Supah P's with 131.  Supah was led by an impressive week from Freeman 44pts and the triumphant return of Mike evans all of which was needed as Supahs also had two players put up ZEROS, Eifert and Williams put the goose eggs  up.  Supah has the answers on the bench with Wright and Chris Johnson putting up 20 and 32 so just needs to make the right calls going forward. 

Eigth place this week was Skza's squad with 117. Noodle Arm Manning maybe turning the corner as he threw for over 300yds and 2 tds rookie stud Cooper also continues to shine,  Off weeks by McCoy, Forte and Edelman hurt the Skza's this week but that shouldn't be the case most weeks.

Ninth place this week was Slippery Wizards with 102, The Wizards are in terrible shape as if they had played their ENTIRE roster they would have had 154pts ( no one on a  bye) which would have been good enough for 3rd place by one point this week!! Ryan and Gore helped the team but Lynch putting up 2 and prater dropping the impressive MINUS 1 did  not!!

Last place this week was Equalizers with 101. Steve smith answered the bell with 42 while Luck continues to under perform did have 20 aside from pats d getting 11 no one else reached double digits! Back to back last place finishes has to have Equalizers circling the wagon for answers, lets hope they hit the waiver lottery or make a trade to figure this out. 

Lets look at the standing after 3 weeks:
1. Jaybirds
2. Black Dynamite          10pts
3. Charlies Angels          47pts
4. Skza's Squad              73pts
5. Creepshots                 87pts
6. DMC                          88pts
7. Beach Bums                101pts
8. Supah P's                   122pts
9. Slippery Wizards          126pts
10 Equalizers                  149pts

    Jaybirds looking to go wire to wire is now in serious jeopardy as Black Dynomite has found its groove. The bottom of the league looks to be separating itself early and it could be a long season if teams don't find their ways with trades or waiver help!! Its a long season but teams still need to make the right plays each week and hopefully avoid anymore big name injuries. No calls this week as financial crunch at drunknothings had the phones shut down. Hopefully, they can get the bill paid by next week or we may have to make home visits. TMX out.

Monday, September 28, 2015

How Come

How come no one is planning hay rides, apple picking, or haunted houses?  THIS IS SOME BULLSHIT!

This is what I learned this weekend:
1. Food truck festivals are the shit!
2. Always a good time bumping into someone you haven't seen a few years.
3. The Hancock Tavern isn't a bad spot. Nice little patio out back and decent food.
4. Welcome back Mike Foley.
5. Who doesn't like college football? I mean football is football.
6. Calnan says that fall is bulking season. So the carb free summer is over.
7. Don't forget the Annual Kubie Krawl is this Saturday in Southie, swing by for some drinks and laughs. The money raised go towards a great cause.
8. Ecco in Weymouth is a pretty inexpensive place for dinner.
9. There is nothing worse than a slow Monday.
10. Papa Ginos pizza is under rated.
11. This list is very food driven.
12. Are you guys sad that CSI is over?
13. Fucking fruit flies are shit! They never ever seem to disappear.
14. How come you can not get a hot dog omelet?
15. I prefer bananas to be more on the green side.
16. Why do I feel like every day I get an email about my damn credit score. Are credit scores the new Nigerian prince?
17. I can do without calamari. Doesn't really do much for me.
18. Has anyone heard from Supah P? I have texted him on a few occasions with no response, man LOVE IS DEEP!

That is all I have today. Food, food and more food I guess.

Thursday, September 24, 2015

TMX week 2 review

TMX week 2 review is here.

There were big name injuries this week and this seems to be the trend for this year, so trades and the waiver wire should be heating up. Equalizers and BeachBums made a trade with the BeachBums getting Mr everything Dion Lewis, Martellius Bennett and Giants d for Pats d, Injured Julius Thomas and Rashad Jennings. TMX loves the action and also loves a team owner's reaction " never trust a beach weasel and a smile".

Lets get to the review.  This weeks winner was Charlie's Angels ( due to budget cuts at Drunknothings TMX lost its stats guy BUT we believe this is their first winning week!) Angels put up 141pts Brady dropped 44 and the Broncos WR corp of Demaryius and Sanders totaled 44 as well! Tight end Allen put up a goose egg but it didn't matter as Card D put up 20 plus!! A solid week which moved the Angels into serious contention at the top! Second with 137 was Skza's Squad. Skza's was led by Edelman ( NINETEEN TARGETS), hotshot rookie Amari Cooper and the J-E-T-S D. Forte  and Shady had off weeks and Blount got Belichicked into a 0 or Skza would have had his first win of the season, either way they are in the hunt. Third place this week is DMC with 128. DMC is riding the big arm of Big Ben who put up 41 and stud ODB put up his first big game of the year. DMC  has some work to do to get to the top but he also has a bench mob of Stevie Johnson ( 1st in the  league in yards after the catch) and whats my name JAMESJONES. All he does is catch TDs. 4th this place was Jaybirds with 121. Jaybirds is the place to go for all your wide receiver needs!! This week the dynamic duo of Julio and Antonio "Wha's that" Brown put up 25 and 37 respectively. His wr's on the bench fitzy and marshall had 38 and 27!! Jaybird equals WR U. Make him an offer before we have Robfrey 2.0 on our hands!! 5th place with 114 was Slippery Wizards. Wizards getting zero from the big name rbs is doing it with garbage time Mathews TDs, waiver pickup Moncrief and Mr 25pts Matty Ryan. Gonna be a long season if that is to continue!!

6th place with 106 was Black Dynamite. Black Dynamite is riding the Rodgers-Cobb-Crosby (14pt kicker) so far that has kept them afloat and now they get best rb in football back ( BELL) so they should be making their way further up the top!! 7th place this week was Creepshots with 104. The Stafford-Mega combo showed some life but the team is starting to be Gronk and the rest of the guys. Browns d putting 34pts up on the bench didn't help "the rest of the guys". 8th place with 101 was Beach Bums. Hill putting up 0 put them in a hole and Landry and Charles were the only guys touching the 20s this week. Mr Everything Dion Lewis may have to be factored into the lineup and Arian Foster is due back soon so BeachBums are not in a bad spot. 9th place this week with 89 was Supah P's. Supah was led by Russy Wilson , Eagles D, and Supah P fav T- Williams. Lacy and Roddy putting up a 0 hurt the squad this week but Freeman and Gio getting more run should help the Supahs or as one owner called them " the ralph tresvants " -( man like me, man with sensitivity).

 Last place this week was Equalizers with 85. Pats d and kicker Tucker led the team. You read that right. Kicker 15 and d 24. How long are Equalizers going to wait for Luck to get out of it is the question?  Well, as we ponder that lets make some calls.

 First up from the last place team we are calling the always hyped up Steve Smith Sr who was on the Equalizers bench this week putting up 25 which is more that any of his starters. Hey Steve whats good its TMX " OH MY MAN TMX WHATS GOING DOWN, THIS IS MY LAST YEAR GLAD YOU CALLED, I HAD A GREAT WEEK 150YDS 10 CATCHES WE WON THIS SHIT RIGHT?" Uhhhm not quite Steve you guys came in last and worse you weren't even in the lineup! " YOU KIDDING ME? REMEMBER WHEN I SAID THERE WOULD BE BLOOD AND GUTS SO WEAR YOUR GOGGLES WHEN THE PANTHERS LET ME GO? WELL TELL WHOEVER ISNT STARTING ME HE BETTER HAVE HIS GOGGLES ON! SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET. SITTING STEVE SMITH SENIOR" Love the intensity ( all caps) Steve and we will pass the message along! You'll be missed next year if your looking for work TMX is hiring. " HA GOOD ONE TMX HOPE YOU CALL ME BACK WHEN I PUT UP ANOTHER MONSTER WEEK. STEVE SMITH SR. DONT YOU FORGET IT OR I'LL BUST YO LIP" Ha old Steve Smith always a great call.

Let's call Tom Brady from the winning team. Hey Tom its TMX great start to the season. " Oh TMX thanks man, just doing everything I can to help the team win, I mean all the players are playing great I'm just doing my part." Always humble which ironically is the opposite of your owner who threw it in the whole leagues face and may or may not have flew a plane over TMX headquarters telling everyone you were the 90th pick in the draft? " oh TMX I'm sure many great players went ahead of me, I'm just fortunate to have great teammates and coaches who put me in position to win ( loud Portuguese yelling in the backround) Tom Tom everything ok? " don't you call my husband or this house I remember you guys sneaking around when I was with Leonardo and then calling me a homewrecker when me and Tommy got together LEAVE US ALONE" Uhmm this Gisele? This is TMX  not that silly fake reporting agency. We are a legitimate fantasy football reporting site. "  huh? oh ?? uhhm let me give Tom back the phone. Hey guys sorry bout that think she thought you were someone else. Ha women. Anyway coach got us preparing for next week so I have to cut this call short. Thanks again TMX. " Thank you Tom good luck the rest of the way.

The season is young and there is plenty of football to be played but with injuries and players having slow starts some teams may not want to hang on too long and have a huge hole to climb out of. Heres a look at the standings as we head to week 3

1. Jaybirds
2. Charlies Angels 18
3. Black Dynamite 20
4. Skza's Squad     27
5. Creepshots        62
6. Slippery Wizards 64
7. Beach Bums       71
8. DMC                  76
9. Equalizers          86
10 Supah P's          90

          As is normal there are tight races at the top and the bottom but it can all change with one good week. Lets hope the injury bug slows down and everyone stars start to play like it!! Trades and waiver wire adds are your friends. TMX out.

Monday, September 21, 2015


Fall is here bitches and that's my favorite season. Hoodies, jeans and comfort food a plenty.

This is what I learned this weekend:
1. It is almost time to use your heat at your house people.
2. Jason Foley is giving away a 55 inch projection TV if you know a guy.
3. It always feels like stealing when you get gas for less than $2 a gallon.
4. Don't fret people, Mario is back from his honeymoon and killing it.
5. All the kids are saying the new Destiny game is the shit. (BY kids I mean grown men).
6. Why does Twitter and Snapchat always change their aps just when I get comfortable with them.
7. Chrissy is flying down to NC to load up Flounders truck and move him back up here. This has all the makings of a story that involves jail.
8. I heard through the grapevine that Supah P is happy in love - even CLEAN SHAVEN!
9. I don't know what show I like better "West Texas Investors club" or "Live free or die". But man I get caught up in both.
10. So some of you have been to the Topsfield Fair, what about King Richards fair? What you know about that?
11. It looks like it is apple picking season. I can not wait for all the apple pies.
12. You don't really learn all that much new shit when you work loads and loads of hours.
13. I always get nervous when Chrissy doesn't text/snap/tweet for a few days.
14. I can  not believe that 2015 is 3/4th of the way over. Feels like only a few weeks ago summer was starting.
15. Fucking Suicide pool massacre this weekend. a pool of 55 down to 4 active with 2 tonight taking Indy...WHATTT!!!
16. Maybe Calnan is slyly dating. No angry blogs, no conspiracy theory texts, no attacking innocent bystanders...only thing I can think of. Welcome back to being a person Calnan.

That's all I have time for people.

Wednesday, September 16, 2015

TMX week 1 in the book review

TMX is back with the weekly review!!

Due to major construction at Drunknothings (look for hats and t shirts coming soon), TMX's reviews have been told to be short and sweet.

First a quick shout out to @jimmykempski a must follow if you want to keep up on all your Iggles info.

Now onto the week 1 recap. This weeks winner was last years dress wearer The Jaybirds who put up 160! The term wagon is well know around ADSL so its no surprise that that's the label Jaybirds is getting! Led by Muddy Rivers and star wr's Julio and Brown the Jaybirds are primed for an end to end run. Especially when you realize he left 36 points on the bench with Carlos Hyde. Jaybirds putting the league on notice.

2nd this week was Black Dynamite. Looks like bringing Black Mike and the crew to the draft has got the boys at Black Dynamite ready to push for the top. Rodgers, Hopkins, Oldman Witten and the Panthers d helped BD put up 154! Considering Bell isn't even back yet and Sproles and Harvin are fighting to get in the lineup its may be another long year for the BD haters; which TMX found out there are many!!

3rd place this week was Charlie's Angels with 121. Brady led the Angels with Ingram helping out. Charlie's Angels was the talk of the draft going all in on the Bronco's offense with CJ, Sanders and D. Thomas. TMX had a rare one on one interview owners of Charlies and there is legitimate concern when the talk turned to "noodle arm" Manning. Getting 19 points out of those two wide receivers is something to worry about, as is picking up Mcmanus and his 15 points and letting them rot on the bench!! Fantasy rule number 1 you pick up a player during the week you start him - PERIOD.

4th place this week was Skza Squad with 114. Skza got a great week from Mr. Everything Forte and Jets D but Manning put up 4 points and Bush put up a goose egg!! Skza's left baby Gronk Kelce's and his 30pts on the bench - that needs to change ASAP!!

5th place this week was Creepshots with 114.  Creepshots were led by Target Monster Keenan Allen and of course Gronk. The Stafford/Mega combo was a week one let down with only 21 and  Sefarian-Jenkins is pushing for the double tight end set putting up 30 on the bench!!

6th place with 109 this week was Equalizers. Led by Sankey ( you read that right) Luck, and the Broncos D. There may be a qb battle over there at Equalizers as Palmer was putting up 36 on the bench!! Equalizers made a name for themselves this week with trying to trade Dez Bryants injured ass for everyone's top picks!!

7th place this week was Beach Bums owners or preseason MVP Doug Martin. Beach Bums put up 109 with Brees, Hill and Charles having decent but not star weeks. Owen Daniels giving the team 1 point at tight end hurt the cause but Beach Bums ain't called Beach Weasles for nothing, they will figure it out and makes some TRAIDS that will get them back to the top.

8th place this week was last years winner Slippery Wizards with 102. Ryan and Mathews put up decent numbers but when a def, tight end and flex player COMBINED get the same as your kicker, changes need to be made.

9th place this week with 102 was Supah P's. Wilson, Lacy and Seahawks D carried the team that started Evans who was out injured and left Eifert and Wright and their 50 plus points on the bench. Bench Mob indeed.

Last place in week one went to the TMX favorite to win it all DMC with 75pts. Big Ben (upside down pick) led the team but number one pick AP putting up 6 and Vinitieri getting NEGATIVE 1 left DMC in big time trouble. Tevin (Campbell) Coleman - AKA Mr Round and Round on the streets - did an ok job getting 80yds but DMC is gonna have to maybe get Romo or Jones in that lineup to get out of the cellar.

 Lets make some quick calls and get out of here, first up Carlos Hyde of the Jaybirds.

Hey Mr. Hyde its TMX calling to talk about your week putting up 36 point for the Jaybirds bench. " TMX? who you fools?? You looking for some sort of donation?" Whoa whoa TMX needs no donations we have enough Folan dollars to go from here to San Fran and back 7 times, we just called to ask you how it feels to be on Jaybirds team and him benching you week one? " listen TMX you seen my quotes? I plays for my family, teammates and the name on my back! you got me? This interview is going all wrong Mr. Hyde. I just wanted to know how you like the league and your team?  " listen my man I aint into fantasy I'm into real life, how'd you even get my number?" We are TMX we have all the numbers and you know what don't bother changing yours cuz good chance we don't call it again. TMX doesn't deal with these attitudes. CLICK. Well that was something, first time in TMX history that we had to hang up on someone. Week one off to a blazing start. That was a first and now another first. TMX next call was to none other than Adrian Peterson. Hey AP its old friend TMX whats going on? " oh man TMX I know what this is about, I had a terrible week and let my team down wont happen again" Well you put up 6 points I guess the obvious question is you think DMC is gonna give you a whooping for that. " Come on TMX TOO SOON TOO DAMN SOON, SON. Look I wait for you to call me next week but I'm out this week before you get worse with your jokes. Later. Well that's more like it no hangups.

Week 2 starts Thursday and the waiver wire should  be on fire with tons of injuries to big name players biggest being Dez. Lets hope stars play like stars this week and nobody gets hurt. TMX out.

Kinda sorry

Just so we are all on the same page, I am not on vacation and I didn't forget to blog. My work has blocked the ability to update the blog but I can still read it so it is a bit frustrating. Then my phone wouldn't sync up with because my blogger account is not the same as my Gmail account. Basically it's been a frustrating 2-3 days to say the list.

This is what I learned this weekend:

1. Bar hopping in Plymouth is a grand time.
2. If you haven't signed up for Uber please sign up today - use 4rirn and you get $20 off your first ride.
3. Julie Nickerson is still searching for a job. Basically she says LinkedIn is your resume.
4. Pulled pork is 100 better smoked than just thrown in a crock pot.
5. Destiny the Taken King just came out and several guys from work took the day off to explore.
6. I love going to the dentist to get my teeth cleaned but man other than that can suck my dick.
7. I love me some fall weather.
8. Jeffrey gets after it at the bar on Sunday's.
9. I almost went #teamiphone on Saturday but I got scared. So I kept my old phone.
10. I think Coke is fucking with Chrissy and moving his schedule around.
11. Is Tooma alive? Haven't heard from him in a hot minute (do people still say that?).
12. As if the Cheesecake Factory needs any more thing on their menu, they have a skinny menu too!! Da fuq.
13. Week one of fantasy football and people are freaking the fuck out. As Aaron Rodgers says RELAX.
14. Still waiting for the Welch house warming party. I've been working on one hell of a warm brie recipe.
15. Waking up to chest crushing heart burn at 2 am is one of the worst things ever.
16. How can they remake Road House? What next Jaws??
17. Who is throwing together an apple picking, hayride taking, cider sipping extravaganza?
18. Has anyone been to the Topsfield fair? I feel like it is something I should have been to at least.
19. When you have a plethora of various hot peppers what do you do? Make some hot sauce of course.
20. Matty Hayes lives for the NFL suicide pool.

I am happy that I got this blog back up. I will keep on working on work arounds. Let's hope TMX comes through with their updates.

Tuesday, September 8, 2015

Footballs back

Okay after 4 fantasy league drafts and college football this past Saturday,  I am officially in football mode. Thursday can not come fast enough.

This is what I learned over the weekend:
1. You never know what old friends you will run into at the beach.
2. Iggles look forward to Chief Blog Ruiner's posts.
3. Louie's has $.25 wings on Tuesdays.
4. Not to sound callous but how come no one is pointing out that the Red Sox got 100000% better after John Farrell left with his cancer. Everyone is claiming that there is no pressure since they are in last place I say not so fast. Cancer or no cancer Farrell should not keep that job based on performace
5. Staining a fence is a pain in the balls. Staining in general is.
6. Kids now a days are such babies. Crying because they don't get their way, or something doesn't go their way or they are just told no.
7. It was nice to have some Fall weather on Friday and Saturday.
8. The suicide pool is back up. You should of gotten an email to join if not let me know.
9. The Bruins are just effing with me to buy my tickets for the winter classic. I was supposed to be able to buy em Sept 2nd but now its been moved to the 10th.
10. Turkey/Chicken chili is not bad at all.
11. Nothing worse than burning the roof of your mouth.
12. I hope the MacPhails made it back from Seasame Street Land. Haven't heard from Chrissy since Friday night.
13. Grapefruit Shandy is all the rage right now.
14. Those Not your Dads Rootbeers are like straight syrup. Not for me, but thanks.
15. There are only 2 people that watch The Incredible Dr. Pol - Tom Kelly and my wife.
16. So Deflategate is officially over right? I mean I am not going to have to hear about it for another 8 months am I?

Sorry I have to run but I have 512 emails I have to rummage through...

Monday, August 31, 2015

Summers over

Labor day weekend is fast approaching and that marks the end of summer. I hope everyone had a blast!!

This is what I learned this weekend:

1. Up until this weekend I had never seen a crow on the beach before. It was kind of weird seeing crows and seagulls.
2. Chrissy is looking for that father of the year award, certainly moved up a few notches with his father/daughter day at the Marshfield fair.
3. If you cant get down with naps then I probably cant get down with you.
4. I hope you guys have been watching Hard Knocks, JJ Watt is a fucking animal.
5. Congrats to Mario and Ashley on their wedding. Great times had by all.
6. Farmers Almanac is a dick.
7. It is official Mike Foley is coming back to Quincy at the end of the month, Chrissy is helping him come back!
8. Backstrap BBQ in Winthrop is legit as fuck.
9. How did I just find out about $2 tacos on Wednesday nights, at Plaza Azteca in Hingham?
10. Who doesn't like surprise delivery?
11. Fucking hang nails are a bitch.
12. Automotive mechanics are such scam artists.
13. I can probably go without gin for a long ass time.
14. What do you guys know about Sesame street place? The MacPhails are heading there this weekend so they won't be crashing any Labor Day cookouts.
15. Everyday you should get after it.
16. How many fantasy leagues is too many? Asking for a friend.

Yes, I am on vacation and I just blogged.
No, Smiddy did not make the Long wedding.

Friday, August 28, 2015

TMX draft review

Football is just about back and the ADSL draft has come to an end so here's is TMX with all the glass shattering details!! The regular board guy Mario Longdashian ( see this kids wedding? hence the name change) was unavailable so we  had two chicks that were never got introduced to and my man Tito, which some wish they were never introduced to!!! The draft was surprisingly quick this year so much so that a few unnamed extended the draft to the casino and buffalo wild wings! We are playing for this belt, The winner of the season gets their name on the belt and keeps it for a year.

Lets just get right to the teams! After TMX wrote their review of each team we googled the teams and these are the pictures that come up...enjoy!

Beachbums as anyone who's followed TMX and adsl knows the Beachbums draft with the full intention of trading and piecing together a championship. Here's their team ( kickers not included) QB Brees, Kap: RB's Hill, Charles, Jennings, Foster, Martin; WR's Green, A. Johnson, Latimer, Floyd, Landry; TE's J.Thomas, Ertz. D Pats, Dolphins. A solid  team that is looking for a big comeback year from Brees and may have hit a lottery ticket with Foster possibly coming back in week 5. Ertz if healthy will finishing with big number in Chip Kelly's offense and Martin is looking like come back player of the year. As soon as BB flips a rb for a top flight wr he will be in the hunt.

Black Dynomite's team is as follows- QB Rodgers, E. Manning RBs- J. Bell, Morris, Blue, Sproles, L. Bell,; WRs- Cobb, Hopkins, Wallace, Harvin, Macklin; TE's Witten, Gates; D Panthers, Bengals. Well, looks like another wagon for Black Dynomite!! Depth could be an issue and the old men holding down the tightend spot but with Rodgers and Leveon Bell they have arguably the top two at those positions plus Cobb gaining recp with Jordy down and it will be a long season for the BD haters.

Charlie's Angels formerly known as..........well its too long to type, its that guy!! Let's give his team a look. Qb's Brady, Newton; RB's Ingram, Cj Anderson, Gray, Williams, J. Stew; WR's Sanders, Thomas, Quick, Adams, M. Bryant; TE's Allen, M. Williams. D- Cards and Niners. Charlie's had a good draft not sure what the strategy was getting all the broncos but failing to secure the qb for double points but hey last time I check TMX hasn't won a league. The tight end position could use an upgrade but Adams gets a huge bump with jordy out. Charlie's should be ready to roll from the jump and then pick up a fired up Brady.

Creepshots ( no relation to Jerkshots) team is QB's Stafford, Tannehill RB's Forsett, Millar, Vereen, Yeldon, Randle; WR's Megatron, K. Allen, Garcon, Perriman, J. Brown; TE's Gronk, Seferian; D- Rams, Browns. A team lead by biggest name in football Gronk and Megatron but will be carried by guys projected to have career years like Forsett, Millar, J.Brown, K. Allen. Good draft will need help in the depth dept but this team is going to be up there especially if Stafford and Mega do their thing.

DMC the TMX odds on favorite to win it all lets look at this juggernaut- QB's Big Ben , Romo; RB's Ap, Mason, Coleman, Gurley, McFadden; WR's Jeffrey, Cook, Odb, Fuchess, Wheaton; TE's Olson, Walker; D- BIlls, Vikes.  The team with the number one pick usually doesn't finish number one but some crafty drafting getting Big Ben and 3 top tier wr's in a ppr league to go along with angry AP makes this team the team to do it!! Olsen is right behind Gronk as top tight end and with Benjamin out he should be a ppr machine!! Getting a solid rb2 should be a priority but right now this team looks like a contender.

Equalizers team is QB- Luck, Palmer; RB's Spiller, Gordon, Sankey, Crowell, Stacy; WR's Tate, Dez, S.Smith, Bolden, Lafell; TE's Bennett, Clay D- Broncos, Giants. Equalizers came in hot with top qb luck but then took a bunch of chances at rb. The wr's are gonna rely heavy on Dez but he may choose to use the double tight end set. The team isn't terrible but there will have to be some upgrades if they plan on hoisting the belt

Jaybirds made the most noise at the draft ( inside draft joke) lets look at the team Qbs- Rivers, Bridgewater; Rb's L. Muray, D.Cobb, R. Mathews, Hyde, Ivory; Wr's A. Brown, J. Jones, Fitz, Marshall, Agholor; Te's  J. Graham, Rudolph; D- Raven Chargers. The Jaybirds have the two top wr's in Antonio and Julio and that should carry them with Graham in the rec and td depts. The rb situation is Murray as rb1 and a few that could hold down solid rb2/rb1. Rivers and Bridgewater should be throwing all season. TMX followers are waiting to see not if but when Jaybirds start traiding! This team is not built to go back in that hot little number he wore at the draft.

Skza's Squad- Came to the draft and stole picks from people. Tremedous strategy all around! Here's the team QBs-P.Manning, Flacco; RBs- McCoy, Forte, Bush, Langford, Blount; WR's- A. Cooper, Edelman, V.Jax, D.Jax, V.Cruz; TE's Kelce, Miller; D- Jets, Chiefs; Skza's banking on Peyton slinging. McCoy and Forte should kill it in the ppr format and Kelce is being favorably to Gronk. The wr position is going to have to stay healthy and counting on a bounce back year from VJax. The team has a lot of questions but that's how the skza's are every year filled with questions but always in the mix.

Supah P's- first team to get hit by injuries as number one wr Nelson went down. Lets get a look at the team- QB"s Wilson, Bradford; Rb's Lacy, Gio, Ellington, Helu, Freeman; WR's Nelson (out), Evans, White, Wright, Watkins, A. Robinson; TE's Cameron, Eifert; D- Seattle, Eagles. The tough break with Jordy out will obviously be painful but Supahs have a solid team with strength in ppr rbs and two potential breakout tight ends. The wr's will have to be strengthened but Watkins and Robinson could surprise. The Supahs starting off in a bit of a whole could lead to some moves.

Slippery Wizards came in with a belt but looking at the team may not be so lucky next year. QB's Ryan, Cutler; Rb's Lynch, Murray, Gore, Abdullah, Duke; WR's TY, Mathews, Decker, Randle, C Johnson; TE's Fleener, Hill D- Packers, Houston. Slippery Wizards aware its a ppr league? Drafted with his auto reverse headphones like its 1990 rb league this year. Obviously team is rb heavy even jumping on latest rb hype Adbullah? Not sure this approach will work will have to hit on Hill at tight end and C. Johnson at wr. Lot of question marks in the wr and tight end position.

Well there's the brief review and as always if you got any breaking fantasy news call TMX!! Good luck and lets hope for a healthy season TMX out. Thanks as always drunknothings for giving us the space.

Monday, August 24, 2015

Blog Blog Blog

Yes I am back from vacation and no I didn't go anywhere.

This is what I learned this while away:
1. Tattoos on the ribs are not comfy.
2. Fantasy football draft days are always an adventure.
3. Good to see Jason Foley and he is slimmed down nicely.
4. I think I hate Buffalo Wild Wings.
5. Wedding rehearsals are my jam.
6. I have no clue about anything on the North shore, so to tell you I have never been to Beverly is an understatement.
7. Julie Nickerson is back and visiting her old haunts. You can catch her at the Sea Note from time to time.
8. I heard that this winter is going to be as bad as last year and they are already dubbing it Winter Dejavu.
9. Honestly do we need a new and updated Angry Birds 2? There is like 37 different iterations of that game.
10. Drinking along at a bar is not bad. Actually kind of theraputic.
11. Board chicks are nice but our board guy was 100% missed.
12. Chrissy is the king of deep fried turkey! Kid does about 7 a year.
13. CVG always looking for someone to go to the casino with.
14. Pretty sure I am gonna cancel my WWE account. Don't think I need it.
15. Man when was the last time you were stung by a bee? Shit still hurts!
16. When life gives you habeneros, jalapenos, thai chilis and hungarian chilis what do you do? Make a spicy relish!
17. Everyone gets caught up from time to time. You just gotta take a step back and breathe.
18. I need a new phone - M9, Galaxy S 6 edge or team Iphone? Any suggestions.

Sorry it is so short but I am trying to play catch up with work stuff.

Monday, August 10, 2015


I mean honestly can this year be flying by any faster? It is more than half over, the summer is slowly starting to wrap up and it seems like the summer traffic is dieing off.

This is what I learned this weekend:
1. Atlantic City is dirty and I think that is a good thing.
2. Southwest Connecticut has the highest incestual rape rate or something along those lines.
3. Buddakan is fucking legit.
4. As far as drinking, you can pretty much drink your face off and pass out at the bars and they won't bother you.
5. Some people hate Snap Chat others not so much.
6. Is Nickerson back in Hull yet?
7. Man Chrissy was off grid yesterday, pretty sure many people thought he was dead - no creep shots, no snap chats and no texts.
8. Timmy Barrett is headed to the Mets game on August 30th if anyone is interested.
9. Jason Foley killing it in the plumbing game.
10. Every once in a while you stumble upon someone who makes you feel like maybe things in your own life aren't that bad.
11. Part of my plan to revitalize AC:
                                 A. Sports book 
                                 B. Open container law on the board walk
                                 C. Dress codes at outdoor bars after 9:00 pm
                                 D. More police presence in and around the boardwalk area.
                                 E. Beach Chair rentals.
                                 F. Open container law so obviously beer stands along the board walk.
                                G.  More non casino bars.
                                 H. Few more out door bars.

12. Car rides on long road trips can make or break the whole thing. Thank god I had a good one.
13. Adderall is a thing, mofos popping them like Pez.
14. Being nice and friendly doesn't cost a thing.
15. I haven't heard from Bill Smiddy since his big break up, I hope he is doing ok.
16. Sometimes you just need a bro's weekend - full of laughing, drinking, ball busting, relaxing and occasionally blacking out.

I am sure there is a bunch of shit I forgot because I legit lost about 6 hours of time on Saturday night.

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

Here's some cheaters to look up to, Patriots.

First let me get a little something off my chest. If your going to blog attach a name to it. Rule # 1 of the blog game. Take me for example, CBR, that's the name. I own the love and the hate with it. Whoever this TMX clown is, get a name will you. Doesn't have to be your own. I'm still personally trying to figure out who this Calnan kid is. But Jesus get a name and own it.

Second, it's that time of the year again! When everyone except New Englanders gets giddy for College Footballs return. And with Deflategate dominating the headlines I'd figure I'd try to tie it in to this rant.

So here it is. Alabama is the New England Patriots of College football. Why? Because they're a pack of cheaters (good cheaters) like the Pats.

And while the Pats dabble in deflated footballs, opening stadium doors to effect wind and pumping noise into a listless morgue like stadium. Good ole Bama does this right in everyone's face with recruiting. Year after year same thing on social media some commit signs with Bama within days or hours tweeting pics of some ridiculous gift. Grew up in destitute southern poverty? Here have a car compliments of Nick Saban.

Which brings me to the next similarity. Ever think you could think of a more pompous arrogant duche then Bellichick? Well I got news for you his name is Nick Saban toss in egomaniacal and their the same person. Both geniuses and winners but Jesus awful people. Jerks to nearly everyone. However, Saban has the distinction of being run out of the NFL for being too crazy towards players.

So how does this mesh with Deflategate you ask? Well when's the last time you've seen Alabama caught for anything in recent years? Cheating, NCAA violations, players smoking PCP and murdering? The answer is you haven't. Why? Because their good. Much like the Pats, they have been wildly successful, command a huge market share and are at the forefront of any CFB discussion.

So to Bellichick. Perhaps it's time to call up your old friend Nick Saban. Same Saban you got the ineligible receiver scheme from, yea know the one Saban uses but moron Pats fans credit to you. And ask him how do I cheat better????

Shout out to Chrissy prob the only Drunknothings reader who follows college.

Monday, August 3, 2015

Triple lock don't smoke the rock first round mock...

Tmx shaking off the cobwebs and back with the annual TMX triple lock don't smoke the rock first round mock. TMX will go into each teams war room (legally for the most part) and find out who the teams are picking!! Its almost draft time and right now every team is in first and completely believe that "this is the year". TMX has spent the summer scouting and talking to all the owners and now here's what all that research brings us!! Here we go!!

 First pick this year (well most every year) is DMC. DMC has been tossing and turning all off season with who they are going with but at the end of the day angry AP is not to be joke with. ADRIAN PETERSON IS FIRST OFF THE BOARD.

Second pick this year is BLACK DYNOMITE. BD had a wagon last year with his extra draft picks this year no such luxury so he will have to take the best back available. JAMAL CHARLES (the self proclaimed LeBron james of his position) IS THE SECOND PICK.

The third pick of the draft goes to BEACHBUMS. Beachbums in unfamiliar territory this high up the board. TMX had a hard time going through all the mock drafts and scouting reports in this war room. Always the  confident risk taker Beachbums disregards the suspension and takes explosive LE'VEON BELL. Side note Bell just became player most likely to be traded by the BEACHBUMS.

Fourth Pick this year is SUPAH P'S. Full disclosure TMX was never able to find SUPAH P'S war room. We searched and concluded either one doesn't exist or it's prolly in TMX best interest to not find it!! We did reach out to a deep source and got the pick. EDDIE LACY is the pick.

The fifth pick this year goes to last years winners SLIPPERY WIZARDS. Biggest no brainer of the draft. MARSHAWN LYNCH is the pick. Slippery Wizards always take an rb and this is their type of guy. Done and done.

Sixth pick this year is CREEPSHOTS, no relation to the former JERKSHOTS. Creepshots like his ever changing name is always a wild card so this is where the draft takes a sudden turn. ROB GRONKOWSKI is the choice. His type of player and sitting in the bottom half no chance he's there on the way back. TMX cleared away the empties and saw the draft board littered with rbs and wrs and in a small corner GRONKOWSKI with a heart around it. Investigative reporting indeed.

Seventh pick this year is FYW. Always steady FYW didn't have much in his war room when we went in there. Talked a lot about loans and I owe you's but said he wants a steady pass catching rb. MATT FORTE is the pick here.

The eigth pick this year belongs to GRAHAMATRON. both Graham and Megatron available but that's not the pick. Grahamatron per usual goes off the board and takes then immediately TRADES ANDREW LUCK.

The ninth pick in the draft goes to the JACKALS. Jackals war room was taken over by  kids and excess plumbing parts so he rolls with last years pick ANTONIO BROWN.

The final pick goes to new team VOODOO. Ton of choices here and the trading Nazi could be picking here for a later trade probably with DMC. Voodoo goes DEZ BRYANT knowing he's broke he gives him first round money then takes best rb available at 11, so welcome back Demarco Murray!

There it is the entire first round TMX mocked to probable perfection. Ok ok ok TMX was out on an island all summer drinking from drinks in coconuts and actually hasn't started going to war rooms but is contractually obligated to roll out a mock by drunknothings so there it is!! TMX out..................til the season starts.

Ok Ok Ok

It is kind of shitty when you don't know what day of the week is or when to eat because your schedule is all out of whack.

This is what I learned this weekend:
1. I guess Salsas in Hingham is closed for good. SUCK IT SAUSAGE GUY!
2. Over/Under on the number of Tuna fish that Gunnah catches the rest of the season is currently 2. Place your bets accordingly.
3. Due to the Cambridge cab companies strike, you will find Chrissy touring Cambridge and Ubering the shit out of it.
4. Speaking of Chrissy he is still planning a trip to North Carolina to meet up with Flounder. Let him know if you are in.
5. The Welches (or is the Welchies?) are now officially residents of Braintree.
6. Calnan (Chief Blog Ruinner to you guys) thinks he can beat Ronda Rousey is a legit fight. Repeated punches to the face is his plan.
7. Frank finally sold his 27 foot boat...for $10,000.
8. Jeffrey is back from Lake Winnapasaukee and may be detoxing...HARDCORE!
9. The summer is more than half over and that kind of makes me sad.
10. Who is geared up for fantasy football? Should I do the suicide pool again this year?
11. Is there anything worse than waking up with a headache?
12. Mitchell is waiting on selling her Pats tickets based on Bradys appeal. She can't miss the flag dropping ceremony.
13. Heard a bunch of guys are headed out to Cowboys stadium this year for the Pats game.
14. When your youngest brother turns 30, you know you are old.
15. Who schedules a 90 year olds birthday party on same day as a fantasy football draft? Especially when asked months ago if I was available on August 22nd?
16. It is official Jeffrey is out for Atlantic City.
17. Chrissy is getting his tattoo this Thursday if anyone is interested in going to hang out and get wings at Ember.
18. I don't know if this is the 3rd Thursday or not but I think Trivia is on this week.

Thats all I got for now. Hopefully, we all make it back from AC alive.

Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Quick! Freak Out! A Girl is Coaching Football

Yawn. Does anyone really think this Jen Welter coaching MEN's football is a big deal???

It's 2015. It was bound to happen. I'm not even being the least bit sexist here. But what is the big deal.

Let's put things in perspective. We've already had our first openly Gay player. Olympic Hero Bruce Jenner is now a woman and TLC continues its non stop train of Litttle Person TV.

So how is some women coaching football gonna do it for me? How am I suppose to see the buzz in that? So vanilla. I mean is there something special about her? Like shes an ex hip hop artist or she's half shark?

Because if she's a competent professional with the resume for the job then get out of my face with that. I turn to the NFL for catchy headlines and interesting storylines not to watch a bunch of competent people advance their careers.

So until you gain some superpower or come out making ridiculous statement after ridiculous statement. I'm sorry I just don't find it interesting.  Do you girl but, gonna have to step it up if you wanna make it somewhere in the NFL (suggestion: don't see many female shark attack survivors coaching ;))

PS Goddell try harder, gonna take a lot more then this to try to smooth the whole hitting women constantly problem over.

Game Time......

In a little more then a week it's war time.

War with that little city that never sleeps by the sea, Atlantic City. All of America's vices jammed into a little sliver by the sea. Booze, Gambling, Skeeball, Unchaste Women and Funnel Cake.

I've spent the last month training, the hardest I've ever. Bench. Squat. Cleans. Sprints and Yoga. I haven't touched a carb in weeks. All so I'm not victimized by Atlantic City.

So let's go over my predictions for the Drunknothings crew.

1.) CBR is victimized by Atlantic City.

It's not a matter of if I'll be victimized, but a matter of when and how. If you haven't caught on I'm kind of a scumbag at times. I've also been wildly successful at escaping AC in the black. Add in I haven't drank in 5 months and this has all the trappings of a disaster.

Needless to say I'm sure you'll all be ecstatic when you read the following Monday I was found pants less in a pool area.

2.) Derek wins money

You heard it here. Derek will win money. Nothing crazy but just enough that it's viewed as a win. And you know why? Because that's how life works. Derek has a ball. CBR loses his wallet and ends up in a sand dune being licked by feral cats.

3.) CBR gets into an argument with the Hotel Staff.

Look this is America. As such there is no excuse for crappy service. My first move in any hotel is scan for deficiencies. Why? Because you pocket them for future use. Example.

Hotel Staff: "Sir are you just wearing a towel? Your in a common area."

CBR: "Well queen of England, I'm between outfits right now, bold statement from someone with inadequate shading in their rooms"

Hotel Staff : " good point here's a voucher for lobster"

And scene. Either that or I end up in a fruitless petty argument over a stain in the room. Jumpball really.

4.) Derek flips out over encountering a little person.

Notice I didn't use that hate filled word Derek loves to use. Not much here other then Derek ruining some persons vacation because he can't grow up. Following them around screaming "awesome". Childish really.

****Note: Ya it's Marios Bachelor Party and this trip is all about him. But if you think for two seconds it doesn't mean Me or Derek atlesst hijack 20 or 30 minutes you don't know anything.  Price you pay partying with such dynamic personalities

Monday, July 27, 2015

Lets get this shit done

Fuck you
Fuck you
Fuck you
You're cool
Fuck you!

Now that we have gotten that out of the way ( I know at least one of you read that and was like I am the cool one I know it).

This is what I learned this weekend:

1. Gunnah just killing the fishing game right now:

2. Who knew Eric "Chief Dude" Kjersgard was a huge Ed Head, you know Ed Sheeran fan.
3. CVG loves and lives for Jeffreys Snap chats.
4. Chrissy still killing the Uber game. Kids back in the saddle.
5. Mario is on fire with his scratch ticket game - $600!
6. Guys, if you see Smiddy buy him a beer. The kid is going through a break up. He may be moving out to San Diego.
7. Who is in charge of planning Nickersons coming home party? The Red Parrot on Sunday?
8. I had no idea Kevin Romine's son plays for the Tigers, hell I didn't even know he plays in the MLB.
9. If you have nothing to do this week Jeffreys and Sarah are up at Lake Winnapasauke.
10. Man how can Hulk Hogan be a Real American using the N word like that? And has "Easy Hulk Hogan" ever been used faster when someone says anything slightly racial? Legit I think it took all of 5 minutes from his firing before I heard someone say it.
11. If anyone is around next Thursday, Chrissy is headed down to Hyannis to get his other daughters name tattoo'd on his other arm. Then he is going to Ember in Harwich Port for pizza and wings. If you are down let him know.
12. Do you think Mario is nervous? The wedding of the year is only 33 days away.
13. Calnan refuses to give Guy Fieri a single cent of his hard earn cash. So that place is out for the bachelor party.
14. Speaking of bachelor parties - Jeffrey was 80% in and now I am hearing he may be bailing.
15. Trying to get into the 40/40 club is hard - you know 40 hours of regular pay and 40 hours of overtime in the same week. I have 40/40 from Sunday to Saturday this week but its technically 2 separate work weeks so WHOMP WHOMP WHOMP.
16. Mike Foley thinks he lives in the Melrose Place of North Carolina. Kids always golfing, happy hour-ing or at the pool.
17. Big week for the Welches - closing on their house Friday!
18. When the fuck did 1st generation Broncos get so expensive?
19. What? Yeah I have been working so much that my tan is starting to fade!
20. Why yes either the water pump on my truck went or I blew a head gasket, either way it ain't cheap.

Lets see how I am doing on Sunday but right now it is looking like a beach day...

Friday, July 24, 2015

Orgies still a thing.......

I could easily turn this into a Chip Kelly was right rant. That Lesean McCoy is an awful person, literally a fumble machine and barren waste land of sexual perversion. And it takes a leader of men like Chip to take out trash like Shady McCoy.

Instead I pose a question. Orgies are still a thing?

And if they are why in the name of God do you use Instagram to recruit for it? I mean there has to be an orgy app by now.  I cannot possibly be the first person to be wondering this. Even if it's just an option on an existing app. For example has to have an orgy option right. Like relationships aren't for everyone. There's probably a few people out there who treat themselves to the occasional Roman orgy. Where's Tinder on this one? Like seriously your supposedly hookup central and your group sex division is so asleep at the fucking wheel, Lesean McCoy has to risk everything just to get enough bodies for an orgy.

It's 2015 and we have professional athletes risking there careers trying to recruit for orgies on Instagram. All because lazy ass Silicon Valley can't throw on an extra pot of coffee and finally hammer out a decent group sex app. It's sad. Can't be that hard. I think the bigger story other then horrible person of the year candidate Lesean McCoy is out throwing Instagram orgies is America's innovation is falling the wayside.

* I'm pretty sure by writing this blog I pretty much kind of sort of have a patent on an orgy app. So if anyone with any computer savvy is reading this (your not) prepared to get sued into the ground if you make one

** I would name the app Pile. Think about it? Pile. Practically bleeds sex. " dude I went to this crazy fuckfest last night I found on Pile"

*** lock of the year King Scum Rex Ryan was at least attending this event had the Internet not ruined it. Probably not participating. Just watching though. Seems like his thing. Just watching

CBR = Mr Worldwide

Now I know you morons are really, really, like really touchy about too many posts (perfection is one post a week of vague comments). So I've decided to streamline CBR hate. Get at me on Twitter @CBRdrunknothing. Ya I know it's missing an S but, there's a 15 character limit. Looking forward to all your well thought out comments with the spelling of a 4th Grader.

Also if your initials are CVG, just block me now. Not really looking forward to the whole drama filled ordeal you'll make this.