Tuesday, September 27, 2022

TMX week 3

TMX week 3 review is here.  It was a wild week and the red crosses are starting to pop up on all rosters. The only team without a red cross next to a starter is Burrow my dick in your ass! The waivers are going to be hot this week and there are teams looking to wheel and deal. Lets get to the recap for week 3.  

Hong Kong Street Pharmacist is cruising and may run this thing wire to wire. They put up 169 this week with Lamar Jackson and Mark Andrews combo going for 76 which was more than two teams got for the week!! WILD. Saquon Barkley is back and looks as healthy as ever and Amari Cooper is making his case as an every week starter. Everything is going right for HK $treet Pharmacist and they seem unbeatable. There's a lot of football to be played but they look good.  

Second place this week was Burrow my dick in your ass with 129.  Joe Burrow ended the QB controversy at least for this week with 3 TDS and James Robinson has turned out to be one of the best 11th round picks ADSL has ever seen. Zeke is scoring, Robinson is rb1,  JK getting healthy and Peirce taking over the job in Houston it shouldn't be long till Burrows is working an angle to start 4rbs ( see T.Hill at tight end move). Its gonna take alot to get to HK Pharmacist but with Adams and Kelce and that stable of rbs Burrow has the pieces. 

Third place this week was Moco Loco with 120. Josh Allen continues to produce putting up another 40 burger  while Kamara hasn't found his groove yet this year.  Moco left Cordarrelle Patterson on the bench and he led the bench mob that put up 156!! Old Moco Loco would have made a blockbuster trade by now rather than have his bench outscoring the starters, lets see what he does this week. 

Fourth place this week was Slippery Wizards with 101. SW continues to play QB roulette and had concussed Tua in this week. Chubb and CMC are doing their thing while he got 6 points combined from two starting wrs and a goose egg from his starting D!! Might be time to make a move over there at SW headquarters. 

Fifth place  this week was Prebathtubwhitney with 99. The Herbert/ Ekler combo is not working as planned and Herbert was on the bench this week with the rib injury. Top wrs Diggs and St Brown both played through injuries so that could be an issue going forward but Capt Kirk has finally found a home in the starting lineup it seems. Tony Pollard continues to get points on limited carries and seems a better option than Henderson right now. 

Sixth place this week was Flyingdingoes with 99. The Dingoes finally got the production from King Henry and even saw him catch 5 passes which is huge if he's being used in the passing game going forward. Not the biggest waiver wire team they dipped in the waivers and grabbed Mariota as they wait out TB12 playing with back up wrs. Dingoes have Jamal Williams on the bench waiting to get some work and that may come this week with Swift day to day. The defending champs are trying to claw their way back to the top and as we said a lot of games to be played.  

Seventh place this week was Pepper Brooks @ the Ocho with 92. Hurts continues to produce putting up 38 but the 3 headed rb group could only get a combined 17 points this week and that wont cut it. Jefferson wont have too many weeks like this and lets put prayers up that TMX fav Tee Higgins doesn't take another head shot and There Goes Swifty gets healthy!! Who shot ya Robinson is also on track to be back week 5 so the rbs are on notice!! 

Eighth Place this week was Silly Gooses with 86. Patience with Kyler Murray maybe running out as he had another subpar game putting up 18pts. Tyreek and Kittle also had off games only getting 4 points apiece. Better days are ahead but Prater being your second leading scorer this week cant continue!!

Ninth place this week was Equalizers with 74. Mahomes had and off day with 19 and Julio Jones was in the starting lineup while being ruled out. Jonathan Taylor so far is not living up to being the number one overall pick and maybe all the off the field action at Equalizers headquarters in effecting the lineup decisions?  

Tenth place this week was Charlies Angels with 71. Angels had injuries to the running backs and bad Matthew Stafford showed up. Allen Robinson is off to a slow start and he might find his way to the bench for Hollywood Brown. If I'm Jimmy G i'd prolly hire some security cuz if he misses Deebo again on those open looks Angels may make a call . Not helping matters was Angels kicker  Will Lutz putting up the MINUS 1 for the day! Charlie's Angels need to weather the injury storm and get to work . 

LETS MAKE SOME CALLS. First up we gotta talk to Mr Lutz. Hey Will its TMX calling how's it going?? " oh man this is amazing I was just in a group chat with some kickers saying you guys never call kickers I'm so honored can't thank you enough for recognizing the kicking game" Uhhm yeah Will its not exactly the best call  I mean you gave the team MINUS points this week! " MINUS no no I mean I missed a kick but I got two extra points hows that MINUS" Yeah well you got a kick blocked and thats minus 2 " wait what? I didn't get it blocked the line did that's not on me! Do receivers get minus on interceptions? This kicker hate is unreal. " Well we are gonna let you go on that note. Yikes who knew kickers even cared?? 

Lets make a call to ol friend Lamar Jackson from HK Pharmacists. Yo Lamar whats good its TMX " oh TMX u back?? how's it going we are lighting it up this year huh? Me and Marky just on a roll" You aren't kidding 3tds every game and two straight with 3tds and 100 yds rushing you are on a mission, is this due to the contract? " oh come on TMX we don't talk bout no contracts we just balling" Sorry Lamar we talk about everything at TMX except Bruno of course. " oh shit good one hey Mark you hear that one hahaha" Wait Mark Andrews is at your house? You guys are that close? " oh hells yeah he's here all the time we just chill and laugh at how many points we getting" WOW guess that makes sense why you guys are so in sync. Well good luck I'm sure we will be talking again if this keeps up. " oh no doubt, Mark says hi and don't be aftraid to call him"  You got it Lamar keep balling. Lets have a look at the standings.




  1.   Hong Kong Street Pharmacist
  2.   Moco Loco                                               66pts
  3.   Prebathtubwhitney                                   93pts
  4.   Equalizers                                                110 pts
  5.   Silly Gooses                                             134 pts
  6.   Pepper Brooks@the ocho                        136pts
  7.   Burrow my dick in yo ass                        143 pts
  8.   Slippery Wizards                                     146 pts
  9.   Charlie's Angels                                       176 pts
  10.   Flyingdingoes                                          233 pts


There is a lot of football left but HK Street Pharmacists are rolling. Big waiver week and teams need to start shaky that trade tree and see what falls off. Lets hope the injuries slow down and good luck in week 4. As always folan.com for everything, TMX out.



Monday, September 26, 2022


 Who knew there was so much money in vintage clothes?

Things I learned this weekend:

1. I may be addicted to Poshmark. Guess there are worse things.

2. Are you officially old when the 90s are now vintage?

3. Congrats to Dave with his new rescue dog, Louie.

4. Nothing prepares you for hanging out with TK and Gerry! Those two will have you in stitches talking about the old days.

5. I mean who doesn't like Titos?

6. Speaking of booze...who gets grape crush shots? That shit tastes like Dimetapp.

7. Cafe Tosca is very underrated. I have never had a bad meal there.

8. Why the hell is the Cheesecake Factory adding to their already expansive menu?

9. I am so excited for Albert Pujols to hit 700 hrs.

10. Best part of Fall is the hearty comforting meals that you get to have. No ones having chili in the middle of the summer.

Tuesday, September 20, 2022

TMX Week 2


Wild week 2 is in the books! 

We had some monster games by some  and some stars that didn't show up and hurt teams. TMX is not here to name names BUT Ekler, Saquon, Chase, Najee, Pitts, Cook, Jefferson, J. Taylor, Davante and Flyingdingoes entire roster we are looking at you!! The trade  market has to heat up these next few weeks as teams need to start making moves. Rumor has it Prebathtubwhitney got a God Sun  tat across the belly (not telling him St Brown's nickname is Sun God ) after his trade and Pepper Brooks @ the Ocho isn't upset with another 40 burger from Mr. Hurts. See people trades work, lazy people don't. Enough with the motivational quotes lets get to the week 2 results. 

First place this week is God Sun himself Prebathtubwhitney who Monday nighted(patent pending) Hong Kong SP with a huge week scoring 176. Prebathtubwhitney was led by St Brown's 39 and a massive Monday night from Stefon Mar'sean Diggs 43. TMX stat nerds report Diggs now has scored the most wr points in first two weeks in the history of ADSL (71). Healthy Herbie and this crew must have the rest of the league wondering if spite drafting is the way to go next year? Lotta football left but Prebathtubwhitney is looking like a powerhouse.  

Speaking of powerhouses, Hong Kong Street Pharmacists came in 2
nd this week with 173 .  TMX heard investigator Wes Cash is still heavy on the case as to how Skza aka Skeeter, aka Rza, aka Rydog, aka Frank Brown Jr was allowed to come in and draft this wagon of a team while HK was chuckling with the guys at crossfit. That case is still in the works but meanwhile Lamar and Andrews dropped 84 points on fools and 'ol friend Kupp put up 30. Tmx called the man who drafted the team and he said " Legally I cant speak on anything but the team you mentioned is stacked from front to back and cruising like my Cadillac." So there's that!! 

Third place this week was Moco Loco with 164. Josh Allen was cruising to a 50 burger when he got pulled late in the 3rd. Sutton and Waddle had strong games and team Moco Loco is tired of beer bitch life and making a push to be a force after two weeks. Kamara gets healthy and this team will be in the mix all year. 

Fourth place this week with 161 was Silly Gooses. The Gooses got a huge game from Tyreeeeek and Aaron Jones was free on Sunday night. Like most in the league they are waiting on an injured player (Kittle) to really see what they can do. Rumor has it management is not happy with Kyler Murray and maybe looking to wheel and deal. Hit them up and see if you can get the TMX discount!! 

Fifth place this week was Slippery Wizards with 149. SW hit the waiver wire for QB help and pulled out Goff for 4 TDS and Chubb got 3 TDS on 17 carries! Slippery Wizards are out the basement for now but dropping Tua ( 60pts) are the kind of plays that will get them back in there!! 

Sixth place this week was Charlies Angels. The Angels came out of the gate hot with 38 from the Tampa D but then couldn't keep it rolling. Good news is they learned from last year with the QB rotation and sat Russy for Stafford which was a great move let see if it keeps up. Tmx ear to the streets rumor team reports they are in the market for RB help. Take that deal people. 

Seventh place this week was Pepper Brooks @the Ocho with 125. Mr Hurts carried the club with a 40 burger and Carlson kicked in 12 points for the known kicker hating Pepper Brooks team. Swift played couple carries but was still third on the team in scoring!! Fun fact Pepper got two IR guys kicking around if anyone is in the market for one. Elijah " dont call me Nora " Mitchell and Brian "who shot ya" Robinson ask for the IR discount and tell em TMX sent ya.

Eighth place this week was Equalizers with 111.  Equalizers had a rare off week from Mahomes and top pick Taylor allowing teams to catch up to him.  Mike Williams showed out and the Bills D is 20 points a week defense that can carry you in off weeks. This team is still loaded and putting up 111 in a bad week is a scary sign. Lotta people in the TMX mailbag asking for updates on the Equalizers manager's exploits . You will have to check with the other TM site, we don't do that here . 

Ninth place this week goes to Burrow my dick in your ass with 87.  Burrow after two weeks has a bad case of QB or not QB. He's sticking with Burrow while Wentz has put up 78 last two weeks. Davante had a rare off week but things are looking up !  Burrow has Peirce taking over in Houston and Bateman has turned into the number 1b guy in Baltimore behind Andrews 1a. TMX ain't here to coach but Adam Theilen needs to be called into the managers office and asked if he's gonna show up this year or nah?

Last place this week was Flyingdingoes with 55.  You put up 55 there's not much good going on. They only had one starting  player in double digits and only two players in double digits on the entire roster. TMX went back as far as the dewey decimal system would take us and found that this has never happened on a roster so loaded with depth. Brighter days are ahead for Dingoes as the Drake looks like the real deal in Atlanta. I'm sure they can revive the team with trades and maybe a dip into the waiver wire waters!!  

Lets make some calls!! First up off the first place team lets ring up Stef Diggs. Yo Stef  whoa what a start you are off to! " TMX you back? Oh man you back and I'm back. I ain't heard from you since I was playing with that chicken arm dude in Minnie! I got a real QB and I'm showing out!" No doubt Stef no doubt you guys are clicking " CLICKING! You got that right. I said at the beginning of the year I'm best WR in the league and I'm here to prove it. Me and Josh bout to tear this league up" Very impressive start thanks for your time Stefon " Thank you TMX, I know you will be calling me again!! Hahaha its Diggsbitch" Ok Diggsbitch guess we will talk again!! Very confident Stefon Diggs! Cant say we blame him, he looks unstoppable. Next up lets call Tom Brady from the Flyingdingoes. Hey TB12 it is TMX what's goods? " (loud crashing sound) Oh hey TMX you're back? Good to hear what's going on" Uhm nothing what that noise? " Well TMX I smashed another IPAD if you need to know. I'm going through a lot and my team is not helping" Well easy on the IPADS Tommy maybe hits some receivers? " yeah right!! I mean if they weren't all hurt, or getting suspended !! Anyway thanks for calling I'll be better next week or else I'm getting Gronk and Edelman back! "  Sounds good TB I'll let the Dingoes know they have nothing to worry about.  Well that wraps up week 2. There were a lot of injuries to monitor and the waivers will be wild with teams needed to fill holes (football term not cross fit) Season isn't lost after 2 weeks still plenty of time to improve !!   

Lets get our first look at the standings for the season!


  1.  Hong Kong Street Pharmacist
  2.  Equalizers                                                          15
  3.  Moco Loco                                                        18
  4.  Prebathtubwhitney                                             24
  5.  SIlly Gooses                                                       51
  6.  Pepper Brooks@ the ocho                                  61
  7.   Slippery Wizards                                               78
  8.  Charlies Angels                                                  79
  9.  Burrow my dick in your ass                             103
  10.  Flyingdingoes                                                   163



   Those are the standings after two weeks lots of time for teams to make moves. The waiver wire is loaded and now is the time to jump on a trade for a struggling guy you hope will turn it around . Good luck this week and lets hope the injuries slow down! TMX out and as always folan.com for everything.

Monday, September 19, 2022


Do you call it Fall, Autumn or just the best damn season around?

Whatever you call it...IT IS HERE!

This is what I learned this weekend:

1. I love how after I book 2 tee times for 8 guys everyone and their mothers now wants to golf.

2. You didn't hear this from me but TK was looking at properties down the Cape.

3. I watched the Elvis movie and all I can say that it is trash and I hated it.

4. People in the city who ride bike blow donkeys. They never follow the rules of the road. 

5. Pumpkin flavored pasta sauce? Is this really what the world has come too?

6. Lot of positive feed back with TMX returning in 2022.

7.  How the mighty have fallen - The Sox are offering 4 tickets, 4 hot dogs and 4 sodas for $49.

8. The Pats win their first game of the season and now everyone is back on the bandwagon.

9. Has anyone used Poshmark before?

10. Joey Martell back off the wagon.

11. Albert Pujols is only 2 homers away from 700. LETS GO!

12. Man that Martha Vineyard situation escalated quickly, huh?

Tuesday, September 13, 2022

TMX is back

Tmx is back. The long standing contract dispute with Drunknothing Inc is now over. 

Basically TMX was the Nate Diaz of fantasy football reporting  but now we have returned to finish out our contract. TMX for those new  to the game is a fantasy football reporting agency  bringing unbiased reports loosely based totally on facts! Week 1 is in the books and what a wild wild week it was. 

The Equalizers put up a week one total of 191!! Foleys walked into draft like he was the new bouncer at the double deuce, leaving the vette running in the parking lot, and between brags of his bedroom prowess he put together one hell of a team.  Mahomes putting up 49 without Tyreek, JT showing why he's the number one pick with a casual 30 burger and the Bills D adding 26 and its off and running for Equalizer. Its basically their belt to lose at this point! ADSL has been put on notice!! 

Second place this week was Hong Kong Street Pharmacist with a respectable 144. HKSP is a new hybrid team this year with Mr Crossfit himself (not showing up due to having to wear a dress/ IT nerd stuff he had to do depending on who you ask) and former ADSL owner Skza. Skza got all the groceries for HK to run the team. HK decided to sit a 14 point kicker so we shall see how this hybrid plays out this season. He did get a huge game from his old friend Saquon and of course Kupp was open all day per usual. The Lamar/ Andrews stack was quiet but that wont continue. HKSP looks like a team on the rise so there should be no reason HK doesn't show up for the draft next year, well unless Skza takes some street justice on him for leaving guys on the bench. Stay tuned. 

Third place this week was Moco Loco with 134. Moco Loco might be back in business like EPMD and the league better be ready. The original smugboy of ADSL coming for that crown. First QB off the board Allen proved why and Mr. Chase did what he does to lead Moco Loco. Great draft also means leaving almost 50 points on the bench with 2 running backs having big days. Check ya in boxes people cuz Moco Loco trades will be coming in!! 

Fourth place this week was Pepper Brooks @ the Ocho with 131. Pepper was carried by Justin Jefferson and there goes Swifty (shoutout to the ol racetrack) Pepper put up a nice week despite a couple injuries and if this keeps up the transactions are going to be record setting and the buffet bout to be LIT!! 

The 5th place team was Burrow My Dick in Your Ass with 127. Burrows team was led by his top two picks Kelce and Adams and as soon as Burrow stopped throwing to the other team he had a decent game as well BUT the Burrow bench was where the real party was at putting up 151 points!! Steelers D and Carson Wentz maybe looking at a starting job either with Burrow or on the trade market! 

The 6th place team this week was Prebathtubwhitney. The man who spite picks QBs and isn't afraid to "burn a pick" put up 116 points. Hurts and Diggs led the team while the rest of the team fizzled. Prebathtubwhitney got Herbert sitting on the bench so I'm sure a move will be made to make that team a contender. 

The 7th place team this week was Charlies Angels (unconfirmed reports say he's changing his name to Justin Jefferson fanboy) with 107. AJ Brown looks like he's in for a monster season and carried the team with Russy getting some Monday night points to save the week. Fun fact Charlies put up the rare Robert Parish double zero when both his healthy tight ends failed to score. Commish can we give a .5 for Chief? seems only right!! Cook and Etienne have better days ahead and Deeeebo is heading back to being the lead back for Niners with Mitchell out so be ready for arrogant sandwiches being handed out from Charlies Angels once again. Prebathtub u hungry?? 

The 8th place team this week was Silly Gooses with 105. Kyle don't call me Keith Murray had an ok day but it looks like Cant guard Mike Thomas is back!! Kittle being hurt didn't help but Kareem Hunt might turn into must start if Harris foot isn't better. Yo Silly G hit the waivers your kickers combined for 2 points!! 

The 9th place team this week was defending champs Flyingdingoes with 99. Joe Mixon was the leading scorer with 18 that pretty much says it all. The Dingoes might have a QB battle brewing with Jameis outscoring TB12!! Something to monitor. New territory for the defending champ should be interesting to see how he bounces back. 

Last place this week was Slippery Wizards with 90 points. SW tied their hopes to fools gold for Dak and Lamb and now they are going to be scrambling from here on out. Week 1 down a hundo is not the best place to be so they better hit the wire and offer up whatever they can to get the team moving in the right direction! 


First up from the last place team Slippery Wizards lets give a call to Dak Prescott.  Hey Dak its TMX hows it goin? " ouch ouch hey TMX glad your back ouchie ouch ouch" Dak you ok what happened out there you really let Slippery Wizards down after they reached for you in the draft. " my thumb , it hurts like real bad, ouch ouchie ouchie"  Dak you kinda sucked before that and its just a thumb you seem to be carrying on a bit here no?? " well it hurts. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah" Dak are you crying?? "yes cuz it hurts its my thumb". Hey Dak we gotta end this call its getting embarrassing get well see you in November. "Thanks TMX. Yikes that was not the call we were expecting. Guess Flyingdingoes was right about Dak. Lets call someone on the winning team. We will ring up old friend Patty Mahomes. Hey Pat its TMX long time no talk!! " Hey TMX how've you been! Glad you are back!!" Thanks thanks great week without Tyreek almost dropped 50 on em. " Yeah all the guys worked together ............hey TMX what's up can you come by for a selfie??......." uhhm who is this? " Its Pat's wife you know me right?? Yeah I always wanted to be interviewed by TMX, so what do you want to ask me?" CLICK. Well that is the first TMX hang up just had to do it sorry Pat. Boy this season is off and running!! There were quite a few big injuries this week so the waivers will be active but the trade lines are wide open so as always TAKE THE DEAL!!! 

Good luck in week 2 and hit up the TMX shop for latest TMX  gear and folan.com apparel.

Monday, September 12, 2022


 The kid is back.

After a whirlwind week off and galivanting around, it feels great to be back at work.

This is what I learned while I was away:

1. Pretty sure I will never get better seats to a sporting event, 50 Yard line row 5, than I had at the Georgia game.

2. I really liked the Springfield MGM.

3. Not only is Sean Riccio alive but he happened to run into Timmy Cleary in NYC at a dance recital.

4. I had the best burger(and now burgers may be ruined for me forever) at Marcel in Atlanta. I would punch a baby for another 1, maybe not a cute baby but a baby nonetheless.

5. I wasn't too impressed with Brimfield this year. Hopefully, next year will be better.

6. Fucking Fantasy football, AMIRIGHT?

7. You didn't hear this from me but Joe Martell is sober for the month of September. Also side note he is an angry sober dude.

8. TK is one year closer to retirement. The old man is rocking 67 quite nicely.

9. Steak frites is underrated.

10. I cannot believe it has taken me 44 years to get to the Basketball Hall of Fame. Good take though.

11. The new Jurassic Park movie is pretty much trash.

12. Went to a German restaurant for the first time. I will be back - give me all the schnitzel and spatzle.

13. The cape house is off the rental market for the season.

14. Tee times are booked for Columbus day weekend.

15. Banana bread is kind of underrated.

16. Chrissy is back with Verizon after a quick affair with Xfinity mobile.