Tuesday, October 14, 2008

ADSL Season 3 - Fantasy Football Update:

5 games decided in the last 15 seconds or OT. Sundays just keep getting better and better. The game of the day was Cardinals versus Cowboys that was decided by a blocked punt returned for a TD. First time in NFL history a game was won in OT by a blocked punt return. Matt ‘Rookie of the Year’ Ryan gets a gift from Lovie Smith when he decides to squib the kickoff instead of going deep. Matty Ice completes a 30 yard out pattern, Elam kicks a 48 yarder as time expired…..game over. Ryan Longwell kicks a 26 yarder with 9 seconds left to lift the Vikings over the Lions. Hello Minny…..you needed a gift wrapped safety and last second field goal to beat Detroit? The winless Rams kicked a 49 yard field goal as time expired to beat the ‘Skins (sorry Derek). And finally Matt Schaub scrambles up the middle with seconds left to give Houston the win over the Dolphins.

Lets get to the ADSL review. Going into the Monday Night game we had 2 stories to watch. JSL Enterprises put up 136.5 points on Sunday and only Madd Fucking Niggerish had a chance to catch him on Monday. JSL got strong performances from Tony Homo…..sorry Romo, Frank Gore, Steve ‘the Beast’ Breaston, and the Vikings defense. MFN was looking to get 39.5 points out of the Burress/Jacobs combo. We will get back to the results in a minute. The bigger story comes from our league leader Nacho Papa, going into Monday night they only had 42.5 points so they needed a huge night from the Giants defense to avoid setting a new low week mark. Of course the current owner of the low week (D ST DIRTBALLS) has already topped, or in this case lowered his low week by putting up 61 points for week 6.

Well D St DIRTBALLS it looks like you lost your shot at the $75 low week award. The G-Men came up big and scored 0 points for Nacho Papa. I honestly didn’t think we would beat the previous low week but we managed to have 2 teams beat that mark this week. I would go on for a few minutes about this but since I have Warner and Fitzy on a bye this week, I think I’ll refrain. For the weekly winner MFN didn’t get the points he needed from Plexi and Jacobs and wound up falling just short. Live it up while you can JSL……Mr. Simpson will be resting his pinky for the next few weeks.

Things I’m Thinking…..
1. Did anyone see Detroit QB Orlovsky run around the back of the end zone for a safety? What was he doing?
2. Who the hell is Dan Orlovsky?
3. Thank you Ken Whisenhunt. You single handedly may have put an end to the icing the kicker with a last second timeout. For that we all thank you!
4. When do the big trades start? I’m hearing rumors…..
5. Entry fee for fantasy football league: $200
Money spent on fantasy football magazines: $30
Transaction fees to stay out of last place: $35 and counting
Listening to Smiddy root for Vincent Jackson to beat up on his beloved Pats to avoid the Costanza Award: PRICELESS!

The Costanza Award: Man you guys aren’t making this thing easy, lets start with the contenders this week. For the second week in a row Street Pharmacist started Santana Moss instead of playing Roddy White which cost him 23.5 points. Defending Champs thought it was a good idea to start Addai over Maurice Jones-Drew, I guess they were wrong and it cost them 32 points. We also want to point out that Scheffler had been ruled out several days ago so we aren’t sure why the Defending Champs had LJ Smith on the bench. And finally Nacho Papa played it safe and benched Bernard Berrian which cost him 23 points. It really comes down to Street Pharmacist and Defending Champs. Street Pharmacist we are not too happy with you right now, we pointed out the 0 point performance Moss had last week and you ignored us. Were you looking for a rebound week? Lets spell it out for you…..RODDY WHITE IS A STUD AND MATTY ICE IS LOOKING FOR HIM EVERY PLAY. Luckily for you Pharmacist you were bailed out by Defending Champ. Congratulations Defending Champ you managed to pull off the Costanza Trifecta: (1) started a player who was inactive, (2) had the worst benching of the week, and (3) managed to throw away a weekly win because of the player you benched…..the Costanza Award is proud of you because you are now in the lead for the Costanza of the Year Award. Congratulations Defending Champ you are the week 6 Costanza Award winner.

I’ll post the cheerleader of the week tonight.

Better luck next week ladies!

3 comments:

Vincent Jackson said...

SUCK IT!!!

Anonymous said...

He's supposed to bench the #3 pick of the draft??? If you want to give the award some credibility, put the lineup you would start for each team before the games begins. Anyone can pick a starting lineup on the Tuesday after the games are played.

Signed,

Not Los

Anonymous said...

costanza awards bring out the anger!! haha