Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Week 16 TMX review

(Due to the holiday season and everyone travelling or getting bombed , we have the the owner of the Dirty Moon Crickets here as a guest writer so lets do this)

TMX here with their week 16 review.

We didn't see the scoring that we had become accustom to in week 16. No one really went off and as usual if different teams played other players then they may of won the week, we are looking at you Beach Bums with Manny Sanders on the bench.

First place was DMC with 147 as the two trick pony was not shut out for a second straight week. Second was the Slippery Wizards with 133 as Mike Evans let them down. Third was Beach Bums with 119 points, considering they had the Bench mob this week you may of wanted to use some of those 115 bench points. Fourth was That Voodoo that you Do with 114 points, yes you read that right as Christmas came early for the team on their 4th name. Fifth this week, and at this point just looking for a weekly win as they are locked in at 8th place, was the Supah Ps with 112 points. Being bailed out by Russel Wilson's 45 burger and sixth place was NoRomo with 108. Black Dynamite comes in at 7th overall his team just under preformed this week. Eighth place with 100 points on the dot was the Jackals (or is it Jason's Jackals), Drew Brees just shitting the bed at the wrong time. Ninth place due to Andrew Luck's 0.36 points was FYW with 95. Coming in last for the week is Grahmatron with 94 points, no one knows what happened to the "Painter" - Kerwynn Williams and his 2 carries for 4 yards.

As we head into the last week of the season the Slippery Wizards extended their lead over Black Dynamite by 31 points - from 97 to 128, The Beach Bums and FYW swapped 4th and 5th place and the battle for the dress/beer bitch just went from 14 points to 41. There is also a $30 scratch ticket on the line between NoRomo and the Jackals with only 11 points separating the 2 teams (Knowing that Foley lost his super bowl match up in his other league he may beat a puppy if he loses this bet).                        

Here are the standings heading into the final week:
                                                        points behind
BLACK DYNAMITE                                     128
DIRTY MOON CRICKETS                          164
Beach Bums Na-Nu-Na-Nu                             244
FYW                                                                  265
NOROMO                                                        344
THE JACKALS                                                355
THE SUPAH PS                                               447
Voodoo That You Do                                       588
GRAHAMATRON                                         629

Other than the $75 for the weekly winners the overall prizes are
1st place $900
2nd place $450
3rd place $225

Now normally this is where TMX calls the players on each winning and losing team but we tried a few and they are all out shopping for their wives, girlfriends, kids or mistresses (Sorry Arian didn't know you were at Tiffanies) so we called SANTA and let him know whats on each teams wish list:

Hey Santa whats up? This is TMX and I know we have been on and off the naughty list over the years, fucking IGGLES,  but this is a serious call. I just want you to know what each team is asking for this Christmas.

Grahamatron is looking for a running back to play a whole game and get over 10 points to help him out of the basement.
Voodoo That You Do is hoping for a new pair of sneakers since beer bitch is a whole lot of walking to and from the bar.
The Supah Ps is looking for a partner who would actually show up, pay attention to the league and make fantasy football fun again.
The Jackals are looking  for an ESPN insider subscription. He is in so many leagues and has so much action on Sundays this can only help. Plus his recent job change made him take a huge hit in the wallet.
NoRomo wanted me to let you know he wants a Christmas Miracle, then winked at me. Im assuming she is on the naughty list and works at Alex's.
FYW said he would just like a TE that catches passes and doesn't block.
Beach Bums Na-Nu-Na-Nu would like this to be turned into a keeper league. He doesn't want anyone else to own ODB EVER.
Dirty Moon Crickets wants to turn his 2 trick pony into a 3 ring circus. Anyone stepping up would help.
Black Dynamite would like you to pay off their Layaway at Kmart oh and if you could let Payton Manning find strength in his right arm they would appreciate it.
The Slippery Wizards would just like Gronk to play a solid 1st half of the game on Sunday.

I don't think that is too much to ask for from a bunch of grown men, Santa.

OH TMX, I will do my best for all you fools but it is Christmas time, why don't you guys call me in August before the draft I may be I can help you guys then.

OK thanks again Santa.

There you have it,  the last week of fantasy is upon us. The waiver wire and crazy pick ups will be happening tonight and we will be at Coops on Sunday to watch the games and have some questions answered:
Will the Slippery Wizards hold on to 1st
How will Black Dynamite, DMC, Beach Bums and FYW end up shaking out.
How bad does the Jackals want that $30 scratchie.
Who wears a dress and who gets the leagues beers at next season draft?

I hope you all have a very merry Christmas

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