Monday, August 3, 2015

Triple lock don't smoke the rock first round mock...

Tmx shaking off the cobwebs and back with the annual TMX triple lock don't smoke the rock first round mock. TMX will go into each teams war room (legally for the most part) and find out who the teams are picking!! Its almost draft time and right now every team is in first and completely believe that "this is the year". TMX has spent the summer scouting and talking to all the owners and now here's what all that research brings us!! Here we go!!

 First pick this year (well most every year) is DMC. DMC has been tossing and turning all off season with who they are going with but at the end of the day angry AP is not to be joke with. ADRIAN PETERSON IS FIRST OFF THE BOARD.

Second pick this year is BLACK DYNOMITE. BD had a wagon last year with his extra draft picks this year no such luxury so he will have to take the best back available. JAMAL CHARLES (the self proclaimed LeBron james of his position) IS THE SECOND PICK.

The third pick of the draft goes to BEACHBUMS. Beachbums in unfamiliar territory this high up the board. TMX had a hard time going through all the mock drafts and scouting reports in this war room. Always the  confident risk taker Beachbums disregards the suspension and takes explosive LE'VEON BELL. Side note Bell just became player most likely to be traded by the BEACHBUMS.

Fourth Pick this year is SUPAH P'S. Full disclosure TMX was never able to find SUPAH P'S war room. We searched and concluded either one doesn't exist or it's prolly in TMX best interest to not find it!! We did reach out to a deep source and got the pick. EDDIE LACY is the pick.

The fifth pick this year goes to last years winners SLIPPERY WIZARDS. Biggest no brainer of the draft. MARSHAWN LYNCH is the pick. Slippery Wizards always take an rb and this is their type of guy. Done and done.

Sixth pick this year is CREEPSHOTS, no relation to the former JERKSHOTS. Creepshots like his ever changing name is always a wild card so this is where the draft takes a sudden turn. ROB GRONKOWSKI is the choice. His type of player and sitting in the bottom half no chance he's there on the way back. TMX cleared away the empties and saw the draft board littered with rbs and wrs and in a small corner GRONKOWSKI with a heart around it. Investigative reporting indeed.

Seventh pick this year is FYW. Always steady FYW didn't have much in his war room when we went in there. Talked a lot about loans and I owe you's but said he wants a steady pass catching rb. MATT FORTE is the pick here.

The eigth pick this year belongs to GRAHAMATRON. both Graham and Megatron available but that's not the pick. Grahamatron per usual goes off the board and takes then immediately TRADES ANDREW LUCK.

The ninth pick in the draft goes to the JACKALS. Jackals war room was taken over by  kids and excess plumbing parts so he rolls with last years pick ANTONIO BROWN.

The final pick goes to new team VOODOO. Ton of choices here and the trading Nazi could be picking here for a later trade probably with DMC. Voodoo goes DEZ BRYANT knowing he's broke he gives him first round money then takes best rb available at 11, so welcome back Demarco Murray!

There it is the entire first round TMX mocked to probable perfection. Ok ok ok TMX was out on an island all summer drinking from drinks in coconuts and actually hasn't started going to war rooms but is contractually obligated to roll out a mock by drunknothings so there it is!! TMX out..................til the season starts.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I'm backing team Creepshots! A name like that could only belong to a hard working man dedicated to his craft.