Sorry

Sorry boys and girls this is going to be a short and sweet things I learned. Work is busy as all fuck and I just don't have the time.

This is what I learned this week:
1. Cats can be stressed and when stressed they piss everywhere, even on ones slippers.
2. Chrissy thinks he writes for the WWE.
3. Any talk of getting a second dog and people freak the fuck out.
4. Doe is starting her next rounds of tattoos this Friday.
5. Shaun Larry is back from his Honeymoon. Ready to start making babies.
6. Someone keeps signing me up for "rock solid picks" via text, 402-913-5903 if you are interested.
7. Mungo and Mary are having another baby girl.
8. Some people just can not multi task.
9. I guess you do not have to shovel your side walks in Quincy. At least the people of Adams Shore don't.
10. I plan on going to the Scituate St. Pattys day parade if anyone is interested.
11. Anyone who doesn't like breakfast for lunch or dinner every once and a while is probably a communist.
12. Jeffrey still states he can run a sub 5 40 yard dash(same kid who says he can kick a 30 yard field goal). Any takers?
13. Anyone have any good tattoo ideas for Chrissy - Polynesian or Mayan in origin? Kid is looking for some ideas. Wants to start his arm.
14. Super P is just waiting on the work(furnace and wall) to be finished then his house inspection. Then he will be the proud owner of a place on the lake in Pembroke.
15. Just because someone gives you a free puppy does not mean it is without costs.
16. People go all out at the Great American Bash at Ned Devines for the Daytona 500.
17. Rio is stepping up his house hunting game. Just fired his 2nd real estate agent and is now working with some Cougar broad.
18. I am none too happy about having to get a root canal.
19. Why is it so hard to get someone to come by and give you an estimate for a home improvement project or 2?
20. It pisses me off that it will rain for 2 fucking days yet the salt never washes off my car.


Sorry that this is a quick short list (and a day late) but works hectically busy with stupid shit all this week. Some list is better than no list.

Hope to see you guys out Sunday before the Bruins/Habs game. SUNDAY FUNDAY IS ON THIS WEEK!

Snow snow snow

How is it we go from no snow all season to back to back weekend of snow storms. FUCKING UP MY DAY DRINKING BOTH WEEKENDS.

This is what I learned this weekend:
1. Mikey T is officially hitched. Mr and Mrs. James Tofuri.
2. I think Chuckie may be shrinking.
3. It is not even a week into Lent and I am already sick of pizza.
4. Jeffrey and Chrissy crashed a wedding and are labeled as douchebags, you guys are A-Okay in my book.
5. Its never good when you get a call from your uncle that your dad is in the hospital.
6. Thats My Boy is a fucking riot. Glad to see Sandler back in stupid funny shit movies.
7. Queso dip is not an acceptable lunch.
8. I love how Aceves acts up and everyone is suddenly an expert on the Red Sox and trades.
9. 50% of giraffes are bisexual. Pretty sure Chrissy would be a giraffe in another life.
10. I think it would suck to be allergic to booze.
11. Katie and I are looking at getting a second dog - we just don't know if we should get a rescue, a puppy or another Mal?
12. I have tried to get into the Walking Dead but I just can't.
13. How come no one wants to go to this Chili cook off at Ned Devines on Thursday?
14. Children ages 5 to 14 die from playing baseball than any other sport. So watch out.
15. Elephants kill more than 500 people every year. They have been known to also rape and kill grown rhinos. Hey elephants maybe you should get some giraffe friends.
16. Pasta that is sealed in a box can stay fresh for up to 10 years - Open pasta is only good for a few days.
17. Did you know Maine has casinos? http://www.oxfordcasino.com/
18. Serendipity 3 in NYC has a hamburger  that costs $295. Also a sundae that cost $1,000.
19. Gas Monkey Garage sells their cars on ebay if you are interested in any of their stuff.
20. Even if you can't do shots at the open bar wedding; You can always get your drinks neat. I like all things neat so why not my drinks.

If anyone is interested in the chili cook off on Thursday let me know mofos.

Till next week.

Next Thursday 2/21

A friendly Chili competition between local Boston restaurants to raise money for Community Work Services! Live music performed by Herland Brothers! Sponsored by Ned Devine's, Corona, Don Julio, Sysco & Trimark.

TICKETS

$10 Tickets include entry and all you can eat chili!

$15 Tickets include entry, all you can eat chili & one Corona-rita with a specialty cup you can keep!

Enter to win raffle prizes - all to benefitCommunity Work Services! Prizes TBA

MAY THE BEST RESTAURANT WIN!

Text of the week

Since this is Chrissy's week on the blog, I am pleased to bring this text of the week(this is the actual text conversation between Chrissy and I, as it is typed) -

C(hrissy): Nothing like coming home & having to call 911 cuz ur tenant is dead.
D(erek):What??
D: The black dude died from the cold?
C: Think so
D: My heart just broke
C: My stomach is turning. Cops asking me questions.
D: Shoukd of had him upstairs
C: I tried he was stubborn
D: Well now hes dead!
C: Well don't have anyone die in your house. Called 911 @ 1145 cop just said another 3 hours
D: Whoa. Are you ok? Good thibg the baby wasnt home
C: Shes upstairs w ali
D: Oh you took the day off to pick them up?
C: Ya I havent seen them in over a week. Was gonna b a nice surprise
D: oh man
C: Welcome home hunny theres a dead guy down stairs
D: That rooms bad news. Set Tooma down a path of destruction and now dudes dieing.
C: Hahaha well I need a new tenant
C: And tooma was down that path long b4 the room.
D: You want me to ask around? Put it on the blog? Ask Dave and Doe, they may want a place up here while they search for a forever home

NEW YORK (AP) — If you don't like coffee or tea, Mountain Dewhas a new breakfast drink that might perk you up.

PepsiCo Inc. is rolling out a new drink called Kickstart this month that has Mountain Dew flavor but is made with 5 percent juice and Vitamins B and C, along with an extra jolt of caffeine.

The company, based in Purchase, N.Y., is hoping to boost sales by reaching Mountain Dew fans at a new time of day: morning.

PepsiCo said it doesn't consider Kickstart to be an energy drink, noting that it still has far less caffeine than drinks like Monster andRed Bull and none of the mysterious ingredients that have raised concerns among lawmakers and consumer advocates.

But Kickstart, which comes in flavors such as "energizing orange citrus" and "energizing fruit punch," could nevertheless give the company a side-door into the fast-growing energy drink market without getting tangled in any of its controversies. The drink comes in the same 16-ounce cans as popular energy drinks made by Monster Beverage Corp., which also offers options with juice content. And the TV ad features young men skateboarding, reminiscent of the marketing themes used by energy drink makers.

Simon Lowden, chief marketing officer for PepsiCo's Americas beverages, says the idea for Kickstart came about after the company learned through consumer research that Mountain Dew fans were looking for an alternative to traditional morning drinks such as coffee, tea and juice.

"They didn't really see anything that fit their needs," he said.

Lowden said Kickstart was developed independently from a Taco Bell breakfast drink introduced last year that combines Mountain Dew and orange juice. PepsiCo says Kickstart, which is carbonated, is also not a soda because its 5 percent juice content qualifies it to be considered a "juice drink" under guidelines set by the Food and Drug Administration. A spokeswoman for the FDA said the agency doesn't have definitions for what qualifies as a soda or an energy drink.

With the growth of energy drinks such as Monster and Red Bull expected to slow, Kickstart could also signal the emergence of a new category that plays off the promise of energy and other health benefits, said John Sicher, publisher of the trade journal Beverage Digest.

In a nod to the growing concerns about sugary drinks, for example, Kickstart also uses artificial sweeteners to reduce its caloric content to about half that of regular soda; a can has 80 calories.

"It's a very interesting experiment capturing a number of attributes," Sicher said, likening it to Starbucks' Refreshers drinks, which promise "natural energy" from green coffee extract.

The promise of "energy" has been a big seller in the beverage industry in recent years, with the energy drink market increasing 17 percent in 2011 even as broader soft drink consumption has continued to decline, according to Beverage Digest. PepsiCo and the Coca-Cola Co. have largely watched that growth from the sidelines, however, with players such as Monster Beverage and Red Bull dominating the market.

But the surging popularity of energy drinks has also led to sharper scrutiny. This summer, New York's attorney general launched an investigation into the marketing prices of energy drink makers including Monster and PepsiCo, which also makes Amp. Lawmakers and consumer advocacy groups have also called on the Food and Drug Administration to investigate the safety of the high levels of caffeine in energy drinks for younger people.

Although Kickstart may look like an energy drink, it has far less caffeine, at 92 milligrams for a 16-ounce can. A comparable amount of regular Mountain Dew would have 72 milligrams of caffeine while a can of PepsiCo's Amp energy drink has 142 milligrams, according to the Center for Science in the Public Interest.

By comparison, a 16-ounce cup of Starbucks coffee has 330 milligrams of caffeine.

___

I know some of you fools don't drink coffee(Chrissy) and you love a good old Mountain Dew to kick ya in the pants. This is prefect for your morning commute to work.  

Survivor

I hope that everyone survived Snowmegeddon 2013! Since I didn't have power from Friday night at 9:30 till Sunday morning my weekend was actually kind of a loss.

This is what I learned this weekend:
1. Yes, that is a river of sea water rushing by my house at high tide on Friday night:

2. You never expect to see your breath inside your house and you never expect your house to get down to 41 degrees either.
3. This guy doesn't seem to mind the snow storm:

4. Nothing is worse than a restaurant opening at 6:00 and basically seating everyone at the same time. Mistakes and lack of service are gonna happen.

5. I heard the Quincy Fire department is hiring.

6. I can't believe that dude Macklemore is white.

7. Chrissy may not have power until Tuesday/Wednesday. Thank god he has plenty of beer and a wood burning stove.

8. New snow boots suck. I feel like I am walking in ski boots. Hey Columbia blow me.

9. Does anyone know of any loft type condos for sale in or around Boston. Dave and Doe want to come back to Mass and want a loft unit.

10. Nothing like getting new pillows.

11. Every one in my neighborhood has a snow blower and man they look like fun. I think that's my next big purchase.

12. Spoke to my neighbor about repaving the drive way. Lets hope that happens sooner rather than later.

13. There is nothing fancy about Margaritas but man I like it there.

14. Katie wasn't as surprised about her New Kids tickets as I thought she would be.

15. I know everyone freaks out about storms. They buy Milk, bread and eggs at the grocery store. Well guess what I made French Toast. So suck it!

16. Nothing quite like seeing your neighbors drinking Bourbon and Bud Heavies at 9:30 am.

17. I am compiling burger joints for blog review. So if you have any suggestions please let me know. I am thinking maybe 1 list of chain restaurants and 1 of other establishments.

18. The dart team is back and revamped. I heard that Chrissy turned them down to join the roster. They tied 6-6 this past week. Next week they are at Rags. Hope you guys can make it.

Hope everyone was safe in the storm.
I have been doing wellness checks on Chrissy. He is delusionally drunk. He told me his dog Stella has started talking back  to him...keep ya posted.

Celebrate

I hope everyone is out there celebrating black history month.Make sure you buy your colored friends some coffee or a beer, and don't forget to give out some hugs.

This is what I learned this weekend:
1. Texans like their beers, even at 10:00 am.
2. 1% of Americans are allergic to alcohol. That number seems surprisingly low considering how man people are allergic to god damn peanuts.
3. I hate each and every Harbaugh. That safety cost Mikey T and I a square.
4. Note to self: when you order a burger medium and it comes back purple, do not try to eat around the raw hamburger, even if they have $3 beers. You will probably be shitting and puking before the days over:

 5. When tipping at an open bar back to $5 tips are encouraged so that you can get straight vodka(with a lime).
6. It wouldn't be a wedding if I didn't have my tie on my head (obviously my eyes are almost closed):

7. Yes, Chrissy I know this is being posted on Tuesday.
8. I did hear that when the blog is not posted by noon on Monday a little piece of one of the readers dies on the inside.
9. The Bruins doing their best to get fans back behind them:

10. I did some scouting for the Worlds Largest Outdoor Cocktail party.  I plan to go this year.
11. Jacksonville is fucking huge. Wanted to go to a bar Saturday during the day and it was 19.1 miles from where the hotel was. THAT WAS IN THE SAME CITY.
12. Looks like Super P is Pembroke bound.
13. Yes people my hair gets curly when its wet.  This shit is natural no perms here!
14. Not good when your fence goes down during a wind storm(even  if the fence is actually your neighbors):

15. Traveling with a suit in a garment bag sucks.
16. Temple Run 2 is way more fun than the original.
17. I know that the ladies love NKOTB but Chrissy may love them a little bit more. I believe he has tickets to both shows in June at the Garden.
18. Northeastern beat BU for the 1st time in 25 years in the Bean Pot.
19. I got asked to turn my ipod down on the plane. I guess the other guests in my immediate area weren't down with Tupac.
20. Airports are like little cities. I mean they have every fucking thing there.
21. Krystal burgers are like White Castle burgers. I enjoyed mine at the Atlanta airport.
22. People get over Gronk partying. If you were 23, almost 24, and a millionaire you would be out partying like a rock star too. I mean I would. Work hard and Party harder.
23. Welchie is out there, finding out anytime you attach the word "wedding" to anything it is instantly $2,000.
24. I am officially out on Shameless. The show was good at first but now its just recycled and lame.
25. Southie Rules is so bad but the kid who sleeps on the couch should have his own show.
26. Now I aint one to gossip but I heard Smiddy is getting backed up in his gambling and may be ducking the bookie.

That's all for now.  I am sure that I was drunk and forgot half the shit like I usually do.
Thanks again for reading...till next week!

Super Bowl Weekend

Oh, I know everyone is all excited for this Harbaugh vs Harbaugh super bowl. The real question is where is the party at? No one is talking about bars, squares or any type of pools.

This is what I learned this weekend:
1. The Bruins still score as soon as I get up and go to take a piss.

2. Mike Gs new nick name is Mike B. The kid lives for bachelor parties.
3. If you have a chance to check out Providence Prime. Top notch food. Bacon will never be the same for me.
4. Apparently, there is such a thing as graying out. Its like blacking out but you remember the most random of events.
5. If you are are at a Bs game and act like you know everything Bruins related don't ask me who #27 is.
6. Chirssy got us to go to Pizza Hut. Kid said the buffalo wings are legit.
7. Jeffrey received his 1st kiss from a black chick. Tremendous.
8. TK was the fanciest dressed guy at the Wickendon Pub.
9. I do not think 12 guys eating and drinking like kings for $1247.68 is a lot of money.
10. The new chicken nuggets from BK are not bad. They taste like the ones from Mcdonalds except the chicken is real.
11. There is nothing worse than when your phone will not connect to the network. Its like being locked in a cave and when you finally get out the sun burns your eyes.
12. Strip clubs with $10 covers and $5 beers are ok in my book.
13. Even though I am no longer on the dart team or playing any more - I am going to the Captains meeting tonight. Chrissy you want officially on the team?
14. Rio is on a self appointed suspension for his drinking actions on Saturday.
15. I dont know why Boston has 94.5 96.9 101.7 and 107.9 for radio stations. They are all the damn same.
16. WB is releasing yet another Batman animated series, This one called Beware the Batman.
17. Harry S. Truman's middle name is S.
18. There is a beer that is $22.50 a bottle. The #28 at the Wickendon Pub.
19. Chrissy, Jeffrey and Mario are all looking to get some ink.
20. Who else has tickets to the Package Tour? Chrissy is making his "I Lost My Virginity to Please Don't Go Girl" shirt as we speak.
21. Does anyone know if Ryan has gotten in touch with Chuckie yet?
22. I would put money on Iggles to win one of those fast eating food contests.

Lets work on a plan to catch the Super bowl fuckers.

It is Tuesday

Holy shit this years flying by. I told Chrissy I took yesterday off from blogging because it was a holiday. Apparently since he had to work yesterday we all should be working.

This is what I learned this weekend:
1. Operation put White Russians back on the map was a success.
2. Yes, I puked, in the sink Saturday night. Cant really remember the last time that happened.
3. How pissed would you be if you were throwing a surprise bday party for months and someone goes and ruins it the day before?
4. The Following was a pretty good show. I mean, there has only been one episode but it moves like a movie.
5. Shaun Larry is a minor celebrity at the Gomo - Gourmet Oriental in Weymouth.
6. A little bit of mousse goes a long way when you have long luxurious thick hair.
7. Hockey is back and now everyone is looking for tickets.
8. Apparently Jeffrey doesn't even like Johnny Walker so he has no idea what to do with his Johnny Walker Green.
9. Chrissy is dieing to go to Pizza Hut. Do they still have all you can eat lunch buffets?
10. No one is interested in 2 tickets to Aaron Lewis at Mogehen Sun?
11. Did I sign up for coupons or season tickets.

12. There are rumors that Hong Kong Dave and his wife are discussing the move back to Boston. I can not confirm this rumor at this time. I may have to get TMX involved.
13. I love when Chrissy comes out with $60 and still goes home with enough cash to buy a cup of coffee.
14. Only Rio would go to the Pats game and roll his ankle while not being drunk.
15. How can you pass up holiday pay? Double time and a half.
16. I want to dick punch people who bitch about the weather being too hot one minute and too cold the next. Its fucking New England. You want one constant temp move to fucking Florida.

Hockeys officially back

The owners have ratified the CBA and so have the players. Hockey is officially back!!

This is what I learned this weekend:

1. It is a known fact you can do what you want at 25 Poplar rd.
2. Shaun Larry and Chrissy Mac are mortal enemies!
3. If you are malado - do you call yourself half white, half black or straight malado (Or is it malardo).
4. Always a good time when Mike Foley just randomly stops by for a game of Golden tee.
5.The yankee regift swap was a hit. I love my rice cooker.
6. Rio can fuck up a queso dip.
7. When you get an elbow to the face. Immediately put ice on it  no matter what. Even if someone just tells you its just puffy.
8. I had to pay $450 to have the vet tell me that my 2 year old dog can not play or over exert himself excercising. Oh yeah he is 3 lbs over weight. He weighs 128 and should not be over 125.

9. Apparently cosequin  for dogs is all BS. But dont tell that to Jack Hannah
10. Shaun Larry is an angry drunk.
11. Welchie is trying to distance himself from the north shore.
12. That turkey sausage from Dunkin Donuts is crap.
13. Just a man and his slippers:

14. Edward 40 hands is real:

15.

15. We always should have neighbors like this:

16. To cut the hair or not? That is the question.
17. Just found out about Zorbing. CRAZY!
18. Ruinite is never going to be the same for me.

Hope everyone had a nice weekend. Pats game is on at 6:30 next week.

Happy Monday

I hope everyone had a good weekend.  The weather surely co-operated for all types of activities.

This is what I learned this weekend:
1. Dunkin Donuts has a new French Toast bagel with cinnamon cream cheese. That shit is legit.
2. There has been a Joe Martell sighting in Quincy over the weekend. He is alive and well.
3. Is there anything worse than the bright sun beating through your windows when you are hungover? Besides maybe a 3 year old child screaming at the top of their lungs.
4. No matter what, when I go out with Mikey Layden its a minimum of $100 EACH.
5. Everyone is so happy that Hockey is back, I am still pissed off and I wish the season got cancelled. These fucking owners don't give one fuck about the fans.
6. These people that are bitching about the $20-25 a week they are missing from their pay check get used to it. The taxes associated with Obamacare are only going to slowly be added each year and you will be missing more and more money.
7. The Yankee re-gift party starts at 3:30/4:00 for the start of the 4:30 football game.
8. I am surprised that no one has asked me for B's tickets - no texts, no emails, no tweets, no facebook messages, as soon as the deal was struck.
9. Apparently no one tells my nephew Ryan "No" and that could be a problem.
10. Seems like more and more people I know are starting to go through the divorce process or some sort of separation.
11.  Should I cut the hair and shave the beard now that the lockout is over?
12. Chrissy can get NFL and Hockey jersey for $40.00 if anyone is interested.
13. I am 35 years old, there is no reason I should have to drink draft beer from a table top tap thing.
14. Have you seen Buckwild on MTV? BEST NEW SHOW ON TV!
15. Don't fuck with mother nature - Man attacked by a Bobcat.
16. If you know me you know I hate Notre Dame, Doug Flutie and cucumbers. So tonight I am the biggest Alabama fan going - Roll Tide.
17. Are people still watching the NBA?
18. Vibrators were originally invented to treat hysteria in women. No shit!
19. The 1st known school shooting in America was in 1764...hows that violent video game excuse looking?
20. Apparently Pats fans already have it books a Manning vs Brady match up for the rights to the Super Bowl.

Hope to see ya this weekend at the Yankee Regift party.

TMX final review

Tmx season final review is in.

A season that was hotly contested coming down to the final week for the dress, beer bitch, and top three spots has come to an end!! 

There were 9 trades this year many of which with big names and big impacts only 2 teams didn't reach out and make a move, The Slippery Wizards and Villenz couldn't find a deal to make, everyone else either helped or in some cases hurt their team through trades. 

There were 188 transactions throughout the year with the waiver wire pickups helping teams who were injured or just plain making them better. The top pickups of the year coming in week two where the number 2 overall kicker Blair Walsh was grabbed and the number 4 overall rb Alfred Morris also grabbed that week. 

The winner this year was Sflabohfrw who took over from Dillonz Villenz in week 13 and held him off the rest of the way. The Villenz were cruising along all while preparing for the perfect wedding then immediately after the wedding the team started to fall!! Talk about the honeymoon being over!! Villenz was able to hold onto the 2nd place spot in the end so that was a positive. Beachbums and DTF fought til the final game for the 3rd place spot and going into the last game of the week both had a realistic shot at finishing in 2nd!! Beachbums held off DTF by 2.5 points to take the final money spot!! The dress wearer and beer bitch came down to the final week as well with the injury riddled  MFN "winning" the beer bitch slot over team Nutsaway who was an absentee owner this year. Nutsaway is the dress wearer and Tmx hopes he put more effort into the dress than he did the season! 

Starting two guys the final week who were declared out and winning the dress by only 49pts is bad!! Two time dress wearer it is for you Nutsaway!! 

The leading scorers for the year by position were Brees at qb; AP at rb ( who was traded during the season); Megatron (first wr taken) at wr; Graham te (first tight end taken) Gotskowski k; and the Bears D.

The All Iggles finished off a year in which we saw its first two losses with a week 17 beat down putting up 217 points. Four benched players scoring over 30 points in the final week seemed impossible giving the players being rested but it happened!!! Next year is right around the corner and there will be rule changes with the flex being added and possibly some new owners. Tmx has confirmed the rumor that DTF is in full negotiations to bring in a former member of the Deadbeat dads a one time ADSL champ and there is an unconfirmed rumor that team Smelchie is looking to get back in. 

There's no off season in fantasy football so get to scouting and see you next year. TMX out.

Out with a bang

I know its getting late in the day and people are worried that I would wait until tomorrow to post things I learned. Well guess what bitches, here it is.

This is what I learned this weekend:
1. There are some creepy fucks that work at the 99!!
2. If you are gonna bring in a Golden Tee ringer, make sure he has played SINCE 2004.
3. How the hell did I find out about Caswells closing HOURS before it closed. Thats some bullshit.
4. I always randomly(inadvertently) find out someone follows this blog.
5. Nothing beats a good old fashion, all day cooking , homemade pasta sauce.
6. This chipotle chicken sandwich from D'Angelos is no joke.
7. Julian can mother fucking eat.
8. People are talking about fantasy football for next year, I am just happy this years over. I am officially retiring Madd Fucking Niggerish and rebranding for next season.
9. As much as I sucked at fantasy this year, Big shout out to my wife, Katie who won her league with the help of Marshawn Lynch, Cam Newton and Trent Richardson.
10. Welchie is officially off the market ladies, have no fear though, Supah P is still DTF!
11. Nothing is worse than being in WWF jail when you can't start any games with anyone.
12. No matter how hard you try, you can never please everyone.
13. Do not take the time to watch Poe. It is kind of a slow paced ehh kind of movie.
14. It is bullshit  that you cant use gift cards towards your Home Depot credit cards.
15. Jackie Chan is a classically  trained opera singer. WHO CAN FUCK YOU UP!
16. If you text the word Seaworld to 26739 you can be entered to win a trip to Seaworld Antartica to hang out with Penguins. Please don't forget me if you win.
17. You have 1 more day to get your 50/50 raffle tickets from the Mass state lottery.
18. Do people actually stick to their New years resolutions?

Lets hope the Pats make it to the Superbowl again.
I will chat with you all next year.

Christmas Eve

I hope that you all have a safe and Merry Christmas. If you are looking for someone to booze with tomorrow - Sean Riccio, 401-574-5069, will be at the Wickedon Pub, getting away from his family. Clal or text him and make sure you share a pint with that naughty fucker.

This is what I learned this weekend:
1. When it comes to her family, my wife has zero patience.
2. A light switch is a simple necessity.
3. Chrissy's daughter snorts salt. Must be a 2 year old thing.
4. Layden can not believe that this is in my living room:

5. MikeyT has been celebrating my birthday on different days each year, I think this year he may actually celebrate it on the actual day this Friday.
6. Should I be offended if an old lady asked me if I got a permanent? Just because my hair is long and starting to curl?
7. I finally saw Ted and it was not nearly as funny as I thought it would be.
8. Who gets a signed Nomar Garciaparra hat for Christmas? I do and everyone knows I was not a fan of his when he was here. Jokes on me!
9. My brother in law, Tim, is quite the ladies man.
10. A co worker is getting his kitchen redone and he said it will cost him at least $40,000. I was like  whoa.
11. Rumor has it Julie Nickerson is in town but I haven't heard from her, Have you?
12. It is hard to find a good foccaccia bread at a bakery.
13. Pork loin sandwiches are under rated.
14. Is it really hard to be nice during the Christmas season?
15. Has anyone ever stuck to their New Years resolutions?
16. The 3rd Annual Whitley Re-gift Yankee Swap has been officially marked down as January 12th. All are welcomed as long as you bring an unwanted gift you got this year at Christmas. Come anytime the food and drinks start flowing at 2:00pm , the gift swapping will be around 7.

Anyone interested in grabbing some food/dinner Friday night then having a few games of Golden Tee? Let me know.

Have a nice safe Christmas, Chaunnaka or Kwanzaa. Whatever you celebrate.

Christmas comes early

Tmx is here for the week 16 review!

We now come down to the final week of the season with no of the big spots decided!! First and second place is now separated by 58pts as Dillonz Villenz who led from week 4-12 has seem to hit the wall. Sflabohfrw took charge in week 13 and has pushed the lead up. Villenz is going to have to dig deep and make the right plays and hope for some of Sflabo's stars to sit to pull this off. The spot for 3rd,  the last money spot is as hot as ever separated by .5 with DTF pulling ahead of Beachbums. This battle has been going on seemingly all season and the right plays in the last week will decide it as both these teams have consistently supplied the All Iggles with players. The beer bitch and dress wearer is down to a 37pt lead MFN has over Nutsaway. Both teams suffering through disappointing season and injuries it will end up who's team has enough healthy producing players in week 17!!

Now onto the results of this week. The 2nd place team surging out of the basement was Slippery Wizards.  Slippery Wizards were looking at a first to worst being in last 3 weeks ago but somehow got it together to be 165 out of last. This week thanks go to Roddy White and the ELEVEN sack defense of the Chargers. Shanks go to Brady and Hernandez who probably cost the Wizards a weekly win. The third place team this week was Sflabo who can thank Beastmode ( Lynch equals championship? he did play a role in Wizards last year) and Thomas. The shanks go to Ridley and Gresham. The fourth place team this week was the Jerkshots. Thanks go to Brees and Colston while both rbs get shanked as Turner and Gore totalled 9pts. The 5th place team this week was Black Dynamite who can thank HOLY ROMO who put 45 but usually solid AP and Niners D get shanked this week.

The 6th place team were the Beachbums who can thank Ryan and Jamal Charles but will have to shank Gonzo for a dismal performance. 7th place this week was Dillonz Villionz who can thank his team Mvp Manning for another great outting but shanks go to his rb Foster and Richardson who totalled 9.5 with one being carted off with a knee and the other with an irregular heart. OUCH.  The 8th place team this week was White Unicorn who had potential fantasy mvp Megatron go off again and can thank Spiller as well but the shanks go to Schaub and Shorts. 9th place this week was MFN who probably just lost another player while Tmx makes this report!! MFN can thank Packers D and Forte til he went down shanks go to both Wrs. Hicks for his 0 points and Paris Hilton for her 4pts MFN will need to make the right plays to stay out of the dress. The last place team this week was Nutsaway. Not much to thank on Nutsaway but Stafford did throw for over 400 yards but zero tds so he gets the thanks the shanks list is long but his best player over the last 4 weeks BJGE gets shanked as well as Victor Cruz who seems to have disappeared on Nutsaway. One big week and Nutsaway could pull himself out of the basement!! The winner this week was DTF who finally got Ray Rice to play a better game than AP and Rodgers had another great game the shank will go to H. Miller the only guy not scoring in double digits for DTF. The fight is on for the final money spot so DTF needs everyone rolling in week 17!! Now onto the All Iggles.

QB-  R. Wilson                    30pts                     Beachbums
RB-  R. Bush                       30pts                     Villenz
RB-  D. Sproles                   22.5pts                   Slippery Wizards
WR- D. Bryant                     43.5pts                  Sflabo
WR- M. Williams                  27.5pts                  White Unicorn
TE-   K. Rudolph                   10.5pts                  MFN
D-     Steelers                      25pts                     Beachbums
K-     Tucker                        15pts                     Beachbums


   The All Iggles finished with over 200pts once again coming in at 204. The Beachbums again were major contributors. Tmx is investigating that the Beachbums war room is shut down and he is going over strategy with Nutsaway these past few weeks. STAY TUNED. Tmx cant pass up the irony of RUDOLPH making the All Iggles a huge scrooge run organization!! All jokes aside the final week is here and its do or die!! Lets hope all your players have to play and there are no injuries.

 Tmx wishes all a happy holiday and good luck. TMX OUT

TMX Week 15

Week 15 is in the books and here is Tmx's review!!

It was a wild week with teams moving and some teams missing opportunities to make the leap. There are two weeks left and with injuries and teams resting players its going to make for a very interesting end to the season. The top two spots are separated by under 40 and the bottom two by 10!! The third and fourth place teams are just as close separated by 22pts to finish in the money! Lets get to it.

 The second place team once again was White Unicorn fourth time in the last five weeks The Unicorns have been runner ups this time losing it on Sundays late game. The Unicorns thanks go to CJ Spiller and of course Megatron who is as hot as anyone in the league, the shanks go to Schaub and Witten and the guy who decided to sit Pitta. Third place this week is Beachbums who is locked in the battle for 3rd and can thank Ryan and Andre Johnson but shanks go to Jamal Charles and Reggie Wayne. The right plays are needed to finish in the money for the Beachbums. Fourth place goes to the current leader Sflabohfrw who can thank Beastmode, Bengals D and Julio Jones but 1pt Ridley gets shanked and puts the rb position in trouble for the final two weeks!! 5th this week was Jerkshots who can only thank Brees while the rest of the team can get shanked as there was not one other player over 20! 6th this week was Black Dynamite who can thank possible fantasy mvp AP who went off again and can shank one last time Ryan Mathews who again failed to get double digits and now is done for the year. 

Tmx listed Mathews as a shank every week and no change finally hes out for the year and maybe  now BD will take him off the roster. 7th place goes to Villenz who is in a dogfight for the top spot. Thanks goes to his rb duo but a shank to Daniels and an underproducing Manning. Villenz needs Manning to get hot again and to make the right plays to pull this off. 8th place this week goes to DTF who can thank Rodgers but shank his usually reliable rbs Rice and Martin. DTF made the Iggles happy this week but hurt his team, right plays will decide if he finishes in the money. 9th place this week is the voodoo cursed MFN who fought through RG3's injury and can thank Dalton and Packers D for ok performances  but Alexander dropping a 0 can get a shank. The injury bug has dominated MFN and he is fighting to stay out of wearing the dress with the last two weeks hoping to stay in 9th!!

 Last place this week was Nutsaway who got big games from his late season pickups Cobb and controversial trade BJGE they get the thanks but Stafford and Cruz get shanked and could have cost them getting out of the basement!! The winner this week was Slippery Wizards who got a waiver wire pickup thanks from Crabtree and solid performance from Brady while shanks go to Roddy White who made one catch!! The All Iggles was the team of the week and thanks mainly to just two teams who are both fighting for the money as well as costing one team the weekly win. Somewhere Iggles smirks.

Here are the totals

QB- C. Kaepernick                                   32pts                        DTF
RB-  B. Wells                                          24pts                        DTF
RB-  C. Johnson                                      23pts                        Beachbums
WR- E. Decker                                        28pts                        Beachbums
WR- J.  Jones                                         26.5pts                      DTF
TE-  D. Pitta                                           32.5pts                      White Unicorn
K---  B. Walsh                                         21pts                        DTF
D-     49ers                                             13pts                        Black Dynamite

                 Well the All Iggles went for 200pts exactly this week and this is exactly what being on the All Iggles is about. The last thing you want is your team on there and this week DTF and Beachbums loaded up the Iggles and cost them chances to get separation and White Unicorn's one player on there was the one that cost him the week!! Never a good time to be on there but to stack the team and cost your team is particularly painful!! Lets not be an All Iggles helper!! The last two weeks are here no Thursday action but there is Saturday action. The waiver wire saw some movement and the last two weeks wr snagged off the wire helped teams with 30pt performances so the wire is still alive!! Lets hope for no injuries and a big week for one of the teams that has yet to win a week. Good luck. Tmx OUT.

1 week left

I hope everyone is out there stimulating the economy and buying up some Christmas gifts.

Lets see what I learned this weekend:
1. Joe Q loves himself some Fuddruckers.
2. I have never seen 2 different guys play hockey left handed with a right handed stick before.
3. I never want to see the day shift at the Golden Banana again.
4. Do chicks really believe guys can't get strippers? I mean Greek is dating one.
5. You really can not beat $15 dollar buckets of beers, even if it feels like you crashed a house party.
6. Supah P not only does landscaping but that mofo even takes down trees,
7. Shaun Larry took a ball off the face during hockey and now has a shiner.
8. Why are Patriots fans so arrogant?
9. The Hobbit was ok. I give it 3 1/2 out of 5.
10. Since when is your dick not above your balls? I mean thats right above your balls, right?
11. Rumor has it Jeffrey couldn't make hockey this year due to a HANGOVER!
12. Chrissy is getting all new windows in his house, suck it drafty windows.
13. According to the drunk irish kids outside the Granite Rail, its the place to be on Saturday nights for a kick ass band.
14. I think that may of been the last street hockey game.
15. Would anyone be apposed to the Yankee regift party being on Saturday, January 12th instead of the 5th?
16. How many times can you be told that you look homeless before you actually shave and get a haircut? I am currently on  8 times in 2 days...going strong.
17. Mikey T does not like to be in a car with the gas light on.
18. Has anyone seen Welchie? WELCHIE?? HELLO WELCHIE?? YOUR FRIENDS MISS YOU!
19. Wal-Mart is so ghetto.
20. The dart team is looking for some new blood. Anyone interested??
21. It is awfully hard to get everyone together for Christmas.
22. You know that you are getting old when you bring Advil with you.

Hey good luck shopping out there guys, and please remember my birthday is a on a Friday this year.
Bottoms up!

TMX week 14

The Tmx review is in!!! Week 14 is done and there are only 3 weeks left!! There is still movement for almost every team to either finish in the money or finish in a dress!! Top 2 teams are neck and neck separated by 29pts and the the 3 and 4 teams are separated by 13pts!!

 Teams 5-7 are all around 100pts from finishing in the money and the final 3 spots is the tightest race separated by only 8 points!! The league hasnt seen this much movement in the final 3 weeks remaining in a long time. There are alot of spots up for grabs so making the right moves is so very crucial as on team on the All Iggles found out this week!! Lets get right to the totals for the week. 2nd place this week was DTF who can thank his rb's Rice and Martin along with wr Marshall all putting up big numbers but QB Rodgers can get shanked as well as .5 scoring Myers Dtf is fighting to stay in the money! The third place team this week was Villenz who can thank Vincent Jackson and pickup of the weeek Kenny Britt but shanks are needed for Owen Daniels and the bears D. Villenz is hanging tough in the race for the top. The fourth place finisher was Slippery Wizards who rode Brady and Hernandez out of the basement barely out but out and can shank Bradshaw and his defense who allowed 58pts this week!! Fifth this week was Nutsaway who slid back in the basement but only by a few points thanking Cruz and Cobb while shanking his rbs .

6th place this week Beachbums who will shank Cj and Gonzo and thank Charles for keeping him in a battle for the money. 7th place this week goes to Black Dynamite who cant thank once again AP who is fighting for fantasy mvp since being traded as well as Steve Smith coming alive shanks will go to two guys who have been on fire Luck and Welker. Black Dynamite is in the mix of teams that could get hot and chase down a money spot. 8th place this week goes to MFN who can thank the browns d and wr Alexander for good performances but shanks goes to last weeks star Bryce Brown and Jimmy Graham. The 9th place team and continuing their slide is Jerkshots. Still in the mix for a push for the money they can thank the bucs d but alot of shanking going around starting with .5 Vernon Davis again sitting Olsen Davis just disappoints also Turner and Colston can get shanked this week! This weeks last place team is White Unicorn. Tmx confirmed this week the elusive Iggles personally called White Unicorn for leaving Seattle vs Arizona on the bench!! OUCHIE.  Unicorns can thank Megatron again guy is legit but shanks go out to a group of players including Schaub, Spiller, Avery and may as well shank Janikowski and his one extra point too!! This weeks winner and Monday night killer is Sflabohfrw. Coming through on Monday night again to take the win and stay in first. Beastmode just as he did last year in the final weeks is leading Sflabo to the promiseland. Gresham and Ridley get shanked and could be the achilles heel for Sflabo but only time will tell if he can hold on. Now onto a record breaking All Iggles team.

QB-  Newton                       45pts                            Sflabo
RB-   Sproles                      21pts                            Slippery Wizards
RB--  Moreno                      28pts                            Slippery Wizards
WR-   Maclin                       25.5pts                         Nutsaway   
WR-   Wallace                     31.5pts                         Black Dynamite
TE-    Olsen                         13pts                            Jerkshots
K-      Prater                        14pts                            White Unicorn
D-      Seattle                       41pts                            White Unicorn

  The All Iggles put up 219pts this week!! A tremendous performance helped by the Slippery Wizards providing the whole backfield and Sflabo giving 45 at qb. The Iggles thanking White Unicorn for the Seattle d which was inexplicably started over the Pats d which was facing his qb? Crazy move that pushed White Unicorn back in the race for finishing in the money not sure that hurts more than a call from Iggles!! The teams supplying the Iggles need to make better choices in the final 3 weeks or they will pay the price!! The final 3 weeks are  the time to make or break the season!! Thursday action tonight starts it all so good luck and hope all are healthy. Tmx out.

Little FYI

My birthday is only 17 days away...if you are out there looking for gifts for me. I am a size 12 in sneakers, a size 38 in pants and a 2xl for shirts.  Oh yeah my birthday is also on a Friday night so if you have babies line up the baby sitters now.

Sorry I couldn't get to the blog yesterday. It was a tad bit busy being 64 in Boston and all.

Lets see what I learned this weekend:
1. I would rather work any Saturday over a Sunday.
2. Some broads get so mad about strip clubs. I don't really get that.
3. Scituate is holding meeting to discuss marijuana distribution centers locations. I am sure the residents love that.
4. Anyone looking for a town house condo up on the North shore? Mikey T is gonna out his place on the market.
5. Jeffrey may be out for hockey this year. He doesn't seem to be able to get a baby sitter...anyone?
6. Believe it or not Chrissy is off for the rest of 2012 so if you are looking to party hit him up.
7. The new Howie Mandell game show is straight up trash.
8. Mikey Layden always seems to put me in a good mood.
9. Is there any worse spot to get a zit than inside your ear lobe?
10. The Japanese population is so old that they sell more adult diapers than baby diapers.
11. This may be the last year for street hockey. No one seems that interested.
12. How much mucus and phlegm can the body produce when you are sick? I mean I must have coughed up at least 5 gallons of the shit.
13. Going to the dentist is just inconvenient.
14. People who are complaining about 65 degrees in December need a swift punch in the junk.
15. Iggles says he gets 53 miles per gallon in his Prius. I MEAN HOLY HELL!
16. TK and I are no longer on speaking terms if he pulls a typical TK move on Saturday and blows off hockey.
17. Would you rather go to Fuddruckers, Kowloon, or Buffalo Wild wings for lunch?
18. I may be off for the second Christmas in a row. Talk about a streak.
19. Why is it people have an opinion, they state it but if yours is contradicting or different they rip you?
20. My wife only buys vegetable soup. I'm home,  sick as a dog and I want some chicken noodle soup or beef barley, hell ill take Dinty Moore beef stew. Nope we only have veggie this or veggie that, cream of some fucking veggie. I went and bought a bunch of soup when I got better, ya know for next time.
21. Is anyone buying the 50/50 raffle tickets from the Mass Lottery?
22. The longer people make snide rude comments about my beard the longer I think i'll keep it.

Hey have a nice week.
Be careful out there. Its a crazy crazy world.

TMX week 13 review

Week 13 is done and Tmx is here to report all about it!!

The season is winding down and the races are as close as they have been with a new team in first and a new team in last!! Last years champs Slippery Wizards are close to pulling off the first to worst move while the Villenz relinquished their grip on first to Sflabohfrw!!! 3rd and 4th place are separated by less than 10 and so is the 8-10 teams for dress and beer bitch! The final four weeks will be the closest ever and each team needs to get production and make the right moves!! Schedules need to be checked and teams that look to clinch and will rest players will be big factors in the final four weeks!! Its the best time of the year for fantasy leagues so lets get ready!! The second place team this week was White Unicorn who is the self proclaimed "reason people in ADSL trade" as he said in an exclusive Tmx interview. He thanks his star Megatron for another solid week. Megatron is the best fantasy player when his team is out of real life contention in the history of fantasy football, astounding his garbage time numbers!! Shank goes out to Reece who failed to put up the numbers and was out performed by benched Sjax. Third place went to the new leader Sflabo who thanks D. Thomas and Cam Newton and shanks Julio Jones as his wr dilemma continues benching Dez who has been must start for a few weeks now!! Fourth place goes to MFN who is making separation from the basement with thanks to  waiver wire star Bryce Brown who had another great week. The shanks go to two stars who underperformed Nicks and Graham. The fifth place team and bursting out of the basement is Nutsaway who thanks White Unicorn for Bjge who had another great game as well as a red hot Stafford. Shanks go to Gates and Cobb who had off weeks! 6th place was DTF who thanks Myers who had a career game while his Rodgers to Jordy Nelson combo gets shanked with bad weeks!!

7th place this week is Beachbums who shanks started on Thursday when Matty Ryan put up a terrible night and Cj did the same Sunday but the thanks are to Jets D and Jamal Charles keeping Beachbums in the race. 8th place was Villenz who continued his slide out of first with thanks to Manning and Richardson trying to stop the slide while shanks to Fitzy and Vincent Jackson who didnt help this week. 9th place is the Jerkshots who have hit the wall. Three weeks ago they were in the top 3 looking to make a run now they have fallen to 6th. Turner and Aj Green should be thanked but a terrible game by Brees and the on again this time OFF again Vernon Davis will get the shanks. This weeks last place team and now last overall is the Slippery Wizards. They had one of those weeks were we will thanks the rbs and shank the rest of the team especially the wrs who combined got 3 points!! The Tmx advice for Slippery Wizards with no more trades is to find a wr on the wire and pray God Brady can get hot otherwise hit the gym dont wanna look sloppy like Smiddawg in a dress.


First place and finally coming together this week was Black Dynamite. Thanks to Romo, S. Smith and per usual since the trade AP again put up big numbers. Shank AGAIN is Ryan Mathews who has been shanked since Tmx started this. Apparently BD doesnt read Tmx or he would have made another trade or not started Mathews. Quick research shows in the 10 wks Mathews has played only ONE week was he over 10pts. Shank City.

Now onto the all Iggles:

QB-    Luck                41pts                    Black Dynamite
RB-    D.Murray          17pts                    Beachbums
RB-    S.Greene          15pts                    Black Dynamite
WR-   D. Bryant           24pts                   Sflabo
WR-   P. Garcon          25pts                    DTF
TE-    H.Miller              17.5pts                 DTF
K-       C. Barth             13pts                   DTF
D-      Texans               31pts                   Villenz

    The Iggles pulled out the win again with 183.5 mostly thanks to DTF who put 3 players on the team far too many this late in the season!! Villenz and Black Dynamite continue to struggle with which qb and def to play having two great options. Cant go without mentioning Iggles kicker hitting 2 50yders this week. Iggles loves his kickers and I'm sure smirked seeing that contribution! The final weeks are going to make or break a season worth of work for alot of team so its important to stay off the All Iggles. Thursday night action has been make or break all season, Villenz you listening? Get your lineups ready and lets hope for no injuries. Good Luck. Tmx OUT.